Year 4: 2013 - 2014: drugs & abuse & london Please Review
by SoulfullyInclined
Summary: Glee S5. Spencer from PLL meets Kate at school. they become friends. during a holiday visit the glee people, Karen's daughters and Toby from PLL come. Karen's daughter Hannah does drugs. Dianna's pregnant again something happens to her baby. Zoe from AHS. *contains alcohol poisoning, abuse, drug use*. there are time gaps. *I don't own anyone*. *Thank you for reading/reviewing*
1. Kate: sept 6, 2013

Beta Reader Please.

For those of you who read the first in this series 'Year 1' and 'Year 2' Jennifer, Rebecca, Cherie, Karen's friends and Ashley's friend Lily and Lia make few appearances. For those of you who really liked those people/pairings please let me know in your reviews and I'll write them in. Jennifer and Jesse are still together as are Rebecca and Evan and Louisa and Cherie. This story is mainly about Hannah's drug use, Annabelle going to her friend's. It also contains alcohol poisoning and abuse.

Ashley's 20, tom's 23, alexa's 19 as are rose, hannah and lily. The twins are 17. kate;s 18, anna's 16. ashley's brother evan's 21. annabelle's 26. in sept. she moved into her mom's and in march she'll move out. In may she'll move out again. So throughout this whole story she's not living at her place.

rachel, dianna, chris, puck, santanna are all 20.

jessica's 16. karen's 44 jesse's 45. pam's 44.

evan annabelle's friend is 28 until june when he turns 29. spencer another new character's 18. toby's 19.

Kate

It was sept. 7th 2015. school had started a wk. ago. I was in my last yr. of high school. I was 18 2 yr. cancer free. I was sitting by myself at lunch when a tall thin brunette came up to me.

"hey," he aid.

I looked up at her: "um. Hi."

"Is it ok if I sit here?"

"um yeah ok."

"i'm spencer," she said sitting.

"oh. Hi im kate."

"nice to meet you."

"you too."

"yeah we just moved here last month and we dont really know anyone. My mom and I that is," she explained.

"oh. Well welcome."

"thank you. If you're wondering I don't have an eating disorder I just have a wicked high metabalism. I'm so tired of people asking me that. I'm from pa."

"oh. And i'm from rhode island. I don't really know anyone here either. Well I mean I know people like my family and my boyfriend but none other than that. I'm not new to the school or anything this is actually my last yr. i'm 18."

"i'm 18 so it's my last too. My boyfriend in London."

"oh one of my sisters is in England actually. Rose. That's where she's from. I wonder if they'll run into each other."

"maybe. Why don't you know anyone?"

"cause I had cancer for 11 yr. I was cancer free when I was 14 my last yr of middle school."

"oh I see. Wow 11 yr."

"yeah so this is the first time i've actually had a friend outside of my family and my boyfriend. Who also had cancer."

"oh what kind?" the brunette asked.

"leukemia."

"blood cancer."

"right. My sister mandy has something similiar. I mean not cancer she just has anemia."

"right got it."

"she's 17 as is her twin. Her boyfriend's 18 mandy."

"oh."

"what do you think of denver so far?" I asked.

"we like it. I mean I miss my friends but i'm going to cpllege next yr. anyway so it's not like id see them a lot."

"ye but that's precisely why you should now."

The brunette looked surprised.

"sorry I um. Realise it's really not my place to say anything given I barely know you. And you me. I'm just really adament about things like that. spending time w/ people you love living each day like it's your last taking in all you can. After all my cancer almost ...well ..."

It wasn't something I told a lot of people.

"no I get it. Are you greek by any chance?"

"no my sister Hannah is. actually i'm not even sure if we're technically related or not. Her parents are my dad's friends from college."

"um. Well from that standpoint no. but scientifically speaking everyone actually is related."

Now there's a weird thought.

"why?" I asked.

"cause most people who aren't don't talk about their family straightaway," spencer told me: "greeks however do."

"then you should meet Hannah. She'll go on and on about her family. Even if it is us. you should hear her grandmother talk she has this great accent. They have really good food too. Hannah's actually in Greece right now in college. she's 19. Maybe you'll meet her at thanksgiving. Er perhaps that's a bit too soon."

"well maybe. Wow. You know it's named after john denver. Not the singer one though another one."

"what I?" I asked confused.

"oh denver."

I'd lived here since I was 2 and I didn't even know that.

"oh. Hey what are you doing after school?"

"not much why?"

"cause if you wanted you could meet my parents and the twins. And my younger sister anna. Well maybe not right after but my parents will be there."

"yeah ok. I'll let my mom know but ok."

"ok. Anna's 16. My brother might come by he's 21 his girlfriend's 20. Um my mom's girlfriend pam will be there and my grandmother sara."

"ok."

"hey are you going to the dance?" I asked.

"the fall fling?" spencer asked.

"yeah."

"yeah if toby gets back in time which I'm hoping he will. I was one of the people who helped deign and put up the posters actually."

"oh. I'm going w/ jake. Actually he might be there too. After school."

It was 7 p.m. and we were having dinner. We being jake, the twin, cherie, adam, jake, pam, jennifer, anna, mandy friend jessica, spencer, my parents and I. we were having it late causse mandy had glee from 4 - 6.

"hi I'm jake," jake said to spencer.

"hey sspencer. How long you and kate been together?" she asked him.

"3 yr. since I was 16 and he was 15. I'm 19. We don't go to the same school."

"oh. Hey great house."

"thank you," louia said.

"I'm adam and I think we go to the same school," adam said.

"yeah we do. And I think we're the same age," spencer said.

"I think I go to that school too," jessica aid.

"I think I go to that school too," jessica aid.

"yeah we do. You're in glee right?"

Jessica smiled: "yeah w/ mandy. And kate."

"yeah you guys have that upcoming Halloween show."

"yeah at the Halloween dance. we have it every yr. you should come."

"I just might."

"yeah our older sisters were in glee before they went off to college," mandy said: "4 of them went last yr. and ashley went. Um. 2 yr ago."

"oh wow big family. I only have one sister. she's older."

"im anna and I'm 16," anna told her.

"well I'm spencer and I'm 18."

We laughed.


	2. Kate

Kate

after dinner spencer I went up to my room.

"wow. So your dad's nice. He's really nice actually," she told me.

"and your parents aren't?" I asked.

"no they are it's just. It's different here. There doesn't seem to be a whole lot of drama here. There was where i'm from. It's so quiet."

"well it wasn't always that way. Stick around something interesting might happen."

"it already has dinner was interesting. And good. Adam and I are in the same class."

"oh wow what a kick."

"so you're in glee? Er I mean well obviously...um."

"do you sing?"

"not. I I used to. But no not anymore."

"oh."

"i like anna. Well I like everyone in your family i've met. She's friendly. Mandy. It's mandy right? The blonde who's w/ adam?" Spencer asked.

"yeah it's mandy. Never amanda. Don't ask," I said.

"ok. Anyway she and her twin are quiet."

"so how did you end up on the dance committee if you haven't been at the school that long?"

"oh they needed an extra person. I'd actually emailed them prior to coming here."

"oh."

"your mom's really um."

"no iknow she's not exactly the warmest person. It's ok."

"ok. Pam seems nice though. When am I meeting the rest of your family?"

"thanksgiving probably. 5 of my sisters are in college out of state."

"oh. Hey do you have any pills?"

"um yeah they're in the linen closet up here."

"ok."

she left.


	3. Evan: fri nov 8th

Evan

It wa fri. nov. 7th, 2013 and I was at the airport w/ lily's mom raven, my sister kate, her friend spencer and ashley's friend puck waiting for my sisters' flight to get in. I was at the baggage claim. The baby Rebecca and I'd just had, Karessa named after my parents Karen and Jesse, was staying w/ my grandmother sara. So now we had Karessa and Reva. we weren't sure if we we'd want more or not but were holding off on trying. Rebecca was still as nervous mom but not as nervous this time. But she still didn't want me drinking just like she hadn't last yr. The sisters that were coming in were ashley, alexa, rose, Hannah and lily. They were in college. Roe's roommate Kate was coming too as were Hannah's parent mark and lacy. Over the summer they'd moved to Boston.

Across the way was ashley. I went to her and hugged then brought her back to raven, kate, puck and spencer.

"Hi good to see you," I told ashley.

"Yeah you too. Wow it's cold here," she said: "how're Rebecca and the babies?"

"They're ok at our place w/ sara. They'll all be at dinner."

"Hi good to see you," kate told ashley.

"Yeah you too. still in glee?" ashley asked.

"Yeah 2nd yr."

"Oh."

"This is my friend spencer," kate introduced.

On the way to the airport spencer, puck and raven had met.

"Hi nice to meet you I'm ashley kate's sister," ashley aid.

"Yeah you too. Where'd you fly in from?" spencer asked.

"fl."

"Oh the sunhsine state. so called that cause of all the orange."

"Yeah. Where are you from?"

"pa. jut moved here this yr. I'm 18."

"Oh. I'm 20."

"and where are you from?"

"Well I was born in new orleans then moved to new york then here when I was 16 then went to fl last yr."

"Oh. I'm hungry."

"Well there'll be plenty of food at my place. My dad's cooking."

"ok."

"Good to see you ashley," raven said when they were done.

"Yeah you too. Are you waiting for lily?" ashley asked.

"Yeah. And Hannah, alexa and rose are flying in too."

"oh. so how do you know kate?" ahley aked spencer.

"From school. We met in sept."

"Oh."

Ashley went to the baggage thing and got her suitcase off it.

"oh there you are," Hannah called from across the way.

He and alexa approached u. we all hugged they met spencer.

"Hey I'm hungry," alexa always impatient aid.

"Yeah I am too. Ashley said there's food at her dad's."

"ok. I'm alexa ashley sister."

"I'm spencer nice to meet you. Where you in college?"

"boston."

"oh that's near where I'm from. I'm from pa. which I right next to new york which I right next to ma."

"oh."

Hannah and spencer talked about the same thing. Hannah and alexa got their bags off the bag thing.

"Hi honey," I heard.

I turned around and Lily and her mom were hugging.

"Hi good to see you," lily aid.

"How was your flight?"

"Ok."

Now we were jut waiting for rose and her roommate kate to get in.

Lily got her bag off the luggage thing and set it on the floor. She, ahley, Hannah, alexa, kate, spencer and puck talked.

"hey! Lady!" I heard from across the way.

We turned and saw ahley's friend santanna approach us. she and ashley hugged then she and puck hugged while ashley and Rachel hugged. Then santanna and puck hugged. And everyone ended up hugging everyone and they met spencer. And talked.

"omygod I didn't know you'd be coming," ashley said.

"Well yeah that was the point," Rachel said: "it wouldn't be a surprise if you knew about it."

"No no it wouldn't."

We all laughed.

"Wow so how's the city?" ashley asked.

"busy. Cold. How's fl?"

I wondered where rose and kate were. I'd been waiting for 20 min.

"I'll go check the tv thingy," raven said.

"Ok," I said.

she went to check it while I waited w/ puck, chris and the ladies. Rachel, santanna, dianna and chris got their bags off the thing and set them on the floor. After a few min. raven came back. I looked at her waiting.

"so it looks like their flight's delayed an hr. it was supposed to get in at 6," she informed us.

It was 5:30 now.

"ok. so I'll go put the bags in the car and then we'll go get something to eat," I aid taking 2 bag.

"I'll help," puck aid taking 2 bags.

"me too," raven said also taking 2.

That was 6 we still had 2 left.

We took the 6 and put them in the car then went back in got the other 2 put them in the car then came back in. we decided to get dinner in the food court on the way I called my dad and told him about the delayed flight.


	4. Chapter 4

It was 6 and we were all waiting for the London flight to come in. we were back at the baggage thing.

"omygod toby!" I heard spencer say.

We looked and saw her running toward a guy taller than her w/ brown hair and blue eyes. When she got to him they hugged. I wondered who the guy was. They walked back to us.

"This is my boyfriend Toby. Who's been in London," spencer explained to us.

She looked happy.

I wondered if Toby knew Rose.

"Hey I'm evan. Spencer's friend's Kate's um. Brother. And theSe are my sisters Kate, Alexa, Hannah, lily and Ashley," I introduced.

"Hey nice to meet you," Toby said.

"Yeah you too."

"omygod so have you eaten how's London it's so good to see you," Spencer said.

Toby smiled: "Apencer slow down. No so I'm pretty hungry. It's nice busy cold. The people are v. nice. And you too."

"I just ate so I'm not too hungry."

"Hi I'm rose," Rose told Spencer.

"Hi nice to meet you I'm Spencer. Do you know Toby?"

"Well we just met so. but um yeah actually I ran into him in London."

"Yeah she's been something of a tour guide for me."

"oh."

So that answered my question.

Everyone met everyone and then we were on our way to my dad's.


	5. Hannah: mon nov 11th

This was inspired by faith alana alastair's 'tarnished stars written...'. Thanks!

Hannah

it was the night of mon. nov. 9th. when my friends and I got to the living room louisa and cherie were sitting on the sofa.

"omygod I really want to go out," cherie was sayinf.

"we will if I can get up," louisa said.

"god you get dizzy a lot."

"well I drink a lot."

"hey," I said.

Cherie jumped about a mile.

"omygod. Hannah you just came in let's go somewhere. Is it snowing?"

in all my yrs i'd never seen her life this. She was usually the calm nice one.

I looked around the room to the window. Although it was dark out I didn't see any snow.

"no it's..."then I caught what she meant: "actually yeah. I'll hit up chris."

"ok. Omygod are you itchy cause i'm itchy?"

clearly she hadn't yet come down.

"no not paritcularly," I said.

"hey are you guys coming?" I asked my friends.

"yeah."

"i want to come," cherie said.

"ok."

when we got out behind the house puck and dianna were there.

"hi," puck said happily.

"are you?" I asked.

"yeah. Greens. If you want some later..."

"um no but I told cherie it was snowing, so."

"right ok."

"i got a light," dianna said holding it up.

"ok."

we sat down on the lawn. It was cold and dark.

My friend took the bent spoon out and held it. My other friend put water on it.

"yall got clean needles right?" I asked.

" 'yall' ," puck said laughing: "you sound like ashley."

"shutit and answer the question. Do you?"

"yeah. Always."

"they damn well better be cause I know someone who got hep when they weren't."

"yeah I think I know who you mean."

dianna held her light under the spoon until it cooked the liquid and the powder.

"needle?" puck asked.

"uh huh. Here," my friend gave him a needle.

Puck filled it and mainlined the drug into louisa's arm.

"oh god that's good," she said.

"anyone else? Hannah you?" puck said.

I didn't know what health problems cherie said so I told him "i brought my own needle man. But yeah."

"oh ok. That's cool."

he filled me up and once he had the drug began to set in.

"if I get sick from this..." cherie said.

"you get sick from withdrawl honey. And we got stuff the green stuff. You're fine. Ok? We got it taken care of," puck told her.

"so long as I keep shooting up. And don't leave room or time for withdrawls. I'm ok."

"well you'll be good anyway but yes."

"you sound just like an alcoholic," I muttered a little perturbed by her remark.

"where you get it?" I asked cherie.

I got mine from my college friends.

"um. Ashley knows a guy who knows a guy that kindof thing," cherie replied.

"oh."

"but if you don't work then you...how do you..."

"pay for it?" cherie asked smiling.

She seemed calmer now.

"um. Well fuking."

"oh. Does louisa know?"

"yeah. She'd rather I use actual money which I have a few times. She knows doesnt agree w/ it."

oh. ok.

"so. Who wants some greens?" puck asked.

"not now puck I want to enjoy this or at least experience it," I said.

"ok well let me know."

"ok."


	6. Chapter 6

Across the way we saw a thin blonde w/ her back to us at the baggage claim.

"i thought we were on the same flight..." rose muttered confused.

She went over to the blonde w/ us following. She introduced us. It was rose's roommate kate.

"now we have 2 kates. My sister' kate. So where ya from?" ashley asked her.

"well ca actually. Um and you?"

"well orig. new orelans then I moved to the city w/ my dad and now i'm here. My former roommate was from CA lila maybe you know her."

"um that sounds vaguely familiar. My best friend lizzie goes to the same college we do. She is in ca visiting her family. She's super nice."

"oh."

"i thought we were on the same flight," rose said.

"yeah. We were. But for some reason your bag arrived quicker than mine."

"oh."


	7. Tues nov 12th

Hannah

it had been 12 hrs. since the last time i'd used and felt horrible. It was 7 a.m. The next day. I woke up got out of bed and went to the bathroom where I promptly got sick. I had this horrible cramping inmy stomach. Luckily I wasn't dizzy but I was too nauseous to get up and lock the door. I heard the door start to open and felt the presence of a guy.

"uh..." I managed letting someone know I was in there.

"oh sorry I. Uh hannah?"

"uh yeah hi."

"fuk what's going on are you ok? Well no I mean you don't look ok. Ok so what's going on?"

he closed and locked the door and sat down next to me.

"i um I think i'm going through withdrawl. Omygod I feel awful."

"ever gone through it before?"

"yeah and. Hey why aren't you we did the same stuff."

"yes but not all of the same stuff. I had trees. Which helps. You can get dizzy off those though so."

"i need a fukin painkiller man and trees are it."

"think you'd be able to stand? Cause we're not smokin them in here."

"uh no. damnit don't you have edibles?"

"uh no sorry."

"omygod."

"yeah I know you're uncomfortable I get it i've been there."

"i shoulda just done more. Not that that's a great solution but i-ok whoa now i'm sick."

"how can I help?"

"just I do we have sprite or something?"

"yeah i'll ask dianna to get some and i'll stay here w/ you."

"ok."

"yeah it'll take awhile."

"well I know that."

"sorry."

"not your fault i'm an addict. Damnit."

"shhh. Get as comfortable as you can. You can even get comfortable on me if it helps."


	8. Chapter 38

The door opened. Someone came in. it was a tall thin brunette. She went to the sink then saw us.

"hi uh...spencer...right?" I asked in my withdrawn haze.

She looked at us: "yeah we met at dinner the other night. I'm kate's friend from school."

"right um hi."

"hey i'm puck," puck told her.

"hi spencer nice to meet you."

"yeah you too."

"sorry I just came in for some advil. I have a headache and you problems."

"oh um they don't keep their pills in the bathroom. They'd get all weird. Here i'll show ya," puck said getting up.

He looked at me: "you ok here?"

"uh yeah."

"ok."

he and spencer left closing the door behind them.

pills I don't know why I didn't think of that that might help. And in fact there were some in my room and a cup. I don't know how much they'd help but they'd help. I wondered if puck had texted dianna yet about the sprite.

I stood and slowly made my way to my room. Once I got there I didn't feel up to filling up the cup but I did have whiskey. I knew you weren't supposed to mix pills w/ alcohol but I didn't like swallowing them dry. So I took 4 w/ the whiskey.

At that moment a knock came on my door.

"uh yeah?" I asked looking towards it.

"it's me," dianna said: "i have something for you."

"ok um it's unlocked so."

"ok."

dianna came in holding a cup she closed the door behind her.

"here it's some sprite puck told me you wanted some," she told me.

"oh ok thanks I was wondering."

"yeah I ran into him in the kitchen he was talking w/ spencer?"

"yeah kate's friend from school."

"she seems um . So what's going on?" dianna asked as I took the sprite.

"i'm going through ."

"oh. Yeah i've gone through it a few times myself. I also drink a lot."

"yeah. See i'm fine when i'm doing the drugs it's when I come off them that's...that's the problem."

"yeah I know what you mean."


	9. Chapter 39

It was that night. I was in my room. I heard puck, spencer and kate talking downstairs. Spencer stopped talking and came upstairs. A knock came on my door.

"um yeah?" I asked.

"hey it's me. Puck says you have pills?" she asked.

"yeah um should be open so."

"ok."

she came in and looked around the room not spotting any in the room.

"in the closet top shelf," I told her: "you can just...i mean...it's ok if."'

"ok thanks."

i'd rather have someone go in my closet than through my drawers.

She went to the closet her back to me and opened it seeing a white statue w/ the celtics basketball team symbol on it.

"oh this is cool," she said seeing it.

"thanks my parents have one just like it. Not...not jesse and karen I mean my actual parents lacy and mark. It feels weird referring to them like that."

"oh. You from boston?"

"yeah."

"oh. I'm from pa so. Pretty close. Basketball fan?"

"well I don't it but I don't like prefer it. I'm more of the artist type."

"oh. And yeah I know what you mean."

"and actually..." I said remembering: "i meant to put that on my dresser when I moved in but. Somehow that never got done. Will you...?"

she handed it to me: "yeah."

"thanks," I said taking it.

"still don't feel like getting up?"

"no um ."

"oh. Well I think they might smoke so if you want to come...it's ok."

"ok yeah maybe."

"i have a headache again. And lady problems."

"yeah I know how that is."


	10. Chapter 40

It was later that night when a knock came on my door. I wasn't asleep cause drugs made your sleeping schedule weird.

"yeah?" I asked.

"hey it's me. I can't fukin sleep do you have any sleeping pills?" spencer asked.

"yeah closet. And it's open so..." I said.

"ok."

she came in closing the door behind her standing against it. She went to the closet and opened it.

"um I see bottles of liquid and no not the whiskey but where are...?"

"oh I mean I have sleeping pills but I don't take them. they're in a box on the floor. Yeah the liquid stuff's..."

"oh zzzquil ok I got it. Also I have another headache so."

"yeah it's ok if you have some aleve," I told her: "or w/e."

"ok damn looks like you have a whole arsenal up here. I don't know how quickly this stuff's going to kick in so..."

"yeah pretty much. And yeah it's ok if you sleep in here."

"ok."

"i'll be back," she said taking them to the bathroom.

"ok," I said after she'd left.


	11. Chapter 411

Hannah

it was the next morning and I was trying to sleep. It was around 1 a.m. I just could not get comfortable. I was sore and twitchy and hot then cold. It was the withdrawl. Spencer was asleep on my floor. After she'd taken the zzzquill she'd fallen asleep. I wondered if zzzquill would help...and maybe walking around would.

I got up quietly from my bed went to my closet opened it and got out the zzzquill. I then went to the bathroom to take it.

When I was in the bathroom a knock came on the door.

"yeah?" I asked.

"hey it's me. You weren't in the room when I woke up and I have another headache and I felt weird about just taking the pills w/o notifying you so..." spencer said.

"uh yeah holdon i'll be right there."

"ok."

I heard her go down the hall to my room.

I took the zzzquill and went back to my room where she was waiting. She was sitting on my floor.

"you look, really uncomfortable," she told me.

"yeah it's the withdrawl. I just took zzzquill thinking it might . Um the pills are in the...closet. And I have whiskey so."

"ok. Yeah cause I don't like dry swallowing."

"yeah I know me either."

she went to the closet and got them then got whiskey.


	12. Chapter 43

Annabelle

it was 2 days later a tues. I was going from the lady's house in aurora to my place in denver. I got up around 11 or 1 that day. She was at work and my roommate was elsewhere. I took the bus to denver well actually to cherry creek. Where I went and saw 2 movies well about half of them. then I went and stopped in at my bar to say hi to people didn't stay long.

I think I went to my place and slept. The next day I i'd slept for 8 hrs. and then woke up around 4 p.m. And felt so much better. So I went to the store and got a book and luna bars then came back. It was a wed. which meant it was karaoke night. I waited around at my place for awhile then went to the liquor store where I got of course liquor. A lot of it. It had gotten dark by then so I went to the BK by the park and got ready put on my makeup. I think the reason I didn't get ready at my place was bc I didn't want anyone other than my friend knowing i'd been there. So I didn't want to leave any evidence. Then I went under a tree in the park drank but not too much as i'd be drinking at the bar and rehearsed. I went back to my place and left the shooters in the closet. Then went to the bar where I met another friend of mine. I sang at least 2 songs but 1 I had to wait an hr. for. The karaoke guy forgot. My friend left early and so then I got 2 crinks white russians. Went back to my place where I drank more.

The next day I read, binge drank and slept until about 3, 4 when I went and got chipotle. That was fri. after I ate the chipotle I smoked my 1st cigerette. In the bathroom bc again I was paranoid someone would drop by. Which was why I didn't smoke in the living room or outside though that probably would've been better smoking it outside. But also it was cold outside so.

So that night I went to a bar on colfax for a bit where I had a sip of red bull and vodka or something. Then I went downtown to the apple bar as I call it. I'd been there before back in feb. 'bout a wk. Or so after my ex I broke up. That time prior to my going to the apple bar i'd gone to leela's. Which i'd left after doing something I shouldn't've. But this time I only went to the apple bar. I had a shot of soco and I was good for awhile. I apparently went back to my place.

The next day I went downtown again to the tarantula bar by leela's. That day was fri. at some point in the days after I went to leela's at 5 in the morning where I think I got fries. Then onto starbucks and back to my place. Where I slept.

at some point during my stay I went downtown again.

9 a.m. And I was downtown. I was looking for evan [my friend not my brother] who I hadn't heard from in 2 months. I hadn't slept in 2 days and had walked over 8 hrs. i'd walked from aurora to downtown. I'd told ashley and another friend of mine where I was going.

I'd called evan at least twice. But he didn't answer his phone. I called again and the answering machine picked up.

"hi I don't know if you're here or not. I haven't slept and i'm really fukin tired and I need you and I...i don't know. I'm headed your way i'm...um..." - I looked around and found myself looking at the mcdonald's i'd just come out of - "i'm on colfax. Out a mcdonald's er I mean i'm outside of. Yeah. I'm tired have I mentioned this? Ashley knows my plan".

I hung up cause I was too tired to continue. I saw a lady approach me.

"do you have bus money?" she asked me.

Never one to turn down someone who needed help I said "i um I think. How much...?"

"no i'm going to give you bus money. You look tired."

"i am."

she gave me a 5.

"wow um thank you."

"of course."

and she was on her way.

I waited a bit for the bus then took it to the civic center where I got off.


	13. annabelle: thurs nov 14th

Annabelle

it was 2 days later 9 a.m. And I was downtown. I was looking for evan [my friend not my brother] who I hadn't heard from in 2 months. I hadn't slept in 2 days and had walked over 8 hrs. i'd walked from aurora to downtown. I'd told ashley and another friend of mine where I was going.

I'd called evan at least twice. But he didn't answer his phone. I called again and the answering machine picked up.

"hi I don't know if you're here or not. I haven't slept and i'm really fukin tired and I need you and I...i don't know. I'm headed your way i'm...um..." - I looked around and found myself looking at the mcdonald's i'd just come out of - "i'm on colfax. Out a mcdonald's er I mean i'm outside of. Yeah. I'm tired have I mentioned this? Ashley knows my plan".

I hung up cause I was too tired to continue. I saw a lady approach me.

"do you have bus money?" she asked me.

Never one to turn down someone who needed help I said "i um I think. How much...?"

"no i'm going to give you bus money. You look tired."

"i am."

she gave me a 5.

"wow um thank you."

"of course."

and she was on her way.

I waited a bit for the bus then took it to the civic center where I got off.


	14. Chapter 9

Annabelle

it was a few hrs. later. I was at evan's. I still hadn't slept. We were arguing. I hadn't seen him since may but back in sept. he'd stopped calling me.

"where the hell were you?" I asked him.

"i was. Doing stuff," he said.

"yeah but where?"

"here."

"i hadn't heard from you in 2 months the least you could've done is drop me a line!"

"well i'm sorry. I didn't want your family finding out."

"that never stopped you before."

"you need sleep."

"no I. Damnit I do," I said sitting: "So much right now. I hurt. I've been walking and I. I'm so fukin tired I don't...i...yes sleep."

"you know where my room is right?"

"yeah. I'm not that tired. I have been here before."

"ok i'm just checking."

I went into his room.


	15. Chapter 10

It was hrs. later when I woke up. I felt a lot better. Tired but not aas much as I had been. I woke up in evan's room.

"hey um," I called.

"hey," evan said coming into the room.

"what time is it?"

"9."

"in the morning?"

"um no cause that would be next morning um I mean tomorrow morning. And that hasn't happened yet."

"omygod I slept all day?"

"this is a surprise to you?"

"i. I guess it is. I have...actually I don't have anything to do right now."

"well you do need to eat."

"thank you," I said already knowing this and annoyed at having been told.

"sorry. So what do ya want?"

"um corn. I really like corn."

"ok. And then we could go back to your place or...?"

"um ok yeah."

"and have fire pepper."

"omygod yes."

I followed him into the living room where he started on the cooking. Fire pepper was his own invention it was whiskey and dr. pepper.


	16. Chapter 11

"so how did you spend your summer?" evan asked me as he was cooking the corn.

"um well I. I...remember, after all that shit happened?" I asked.

"yeah and then we got together 2 days later," he said.

"right well after that my dad I went to their cabin for a wk. Which is like the worst idea ever."

"yeah i'd think so."

"where I didn't eat for 5 days."

"oh...sweetie...i wow. And I thought 2 days..."

"no I know i'm not exactly proud of it. But I won't eat just around my dad."

"oh. Wow."

"so then. I was at my mom's until like well now when I was staying w/ this lady who told me I could do what I wanted when I wanted. Well how could I say no to that I mean she basically gave me a free ticket right there. My parents are overseas btw."

"right ok."

"so basically yeah that's it."

"ok. Hey does...well actually nvrm. I just got a new lock for..."

"wait no. cause my parents will wonder who changed it. I mean i'm paranoid as fuk too. But yeah um no."

"then how?"

"i still have my key. It'll be fine probably we'll just stay in the closet."

"but what if your sister...?"

"i. shit I had't thought of that."

"well maybe we should hold off on that until you have a plan."

"ok. Oh I also drank cause there was a liquor store right by my mom's where i'd get fireball. And then. Well that closed down so."

"right."


	17. fri nov 15th: evan: annabelle

No one knows where annabelle is

evan

it was 2 a.m. When my phone rang.

"uh?" I asked flipping it open.

"hey have you seen annabelle?" alexa asked.

Shouldn't she have been asleep?

"shouldn't you be asleep?" I asked her.

"evan!"

"ok damn. Um no why?"

"cause the lady she was staying w/ can't find her."

"oh. Um no ashley hasn't told me anything. I'll hit her up."

"ok well whenever you find out..."

"yeah I will."

"ok."

we hung up and I texted ashley: 'hey do you know where annabelle is?'

'yes but she doesn't want me to tell you. She's ok and she's safe. If she wants you to know she'll let me know. This is what I told jesse' read ashley's reply.

'ok. Sorry to wake you...but alexa woke me and asked so...i said i'd hyu'

'ok'.

I called alexa and told her this.

"mmm?" rebecca asked.

"i. nothing. Well not 'nothing' but i'll tell you when i'm ready. Everyone's ok though," I said.

"ok."

that's right. Annabelle's parents were overseas. Not like she would've told them where she had gone to. I was glad to know she was ok and safe wherever she was.


	18. Chapter 37

"hey," evan said looking at annabelle.

"yeah?" she asked.

"um shouldn't you be at your house won't they wonder where you went?"

"yeah um probably. But I had a feeling I was needed here so."

"oh."

"also christopher's at the hospital...and nicole's at the hospital so."

"oh."

"christopher?" I asked.

"he's my roommate. And nicole's the lady's daughter well one of them. the lady being the lady I live w/. her other daughter's jenn. I like her she's cool."

"oh. ok."


	19. Chapter 42

Annabelle

evan I were at my place. Apparently alexa had called my cousin evan who hit up ashley who hit up me and had told me this. I told her I was ok and safe but I didn't want her telling my cousin evan where I was. She'd told jesse and evan this then told my sister kaitlyn. My family didn't like my friend evan well my mom and my sister didn't but my dad might've been ok w/ him. I didn't like my dad though and didn't want him involved. I also didn't see the point in letting my mom sister know who I was w/ given they didn't like him. That wouldn't do anything for anyone so. I'd told my friend all this. If my sister had anything to say about this I knew she'd bring it up w/ ashley. I'd even put a chair in front of my front door if anyone did come by unexpectedly.

I was so tired so when I got there i'd slept for 8 hrs. and then woke up around 4 p.m. And felt so much better. So I went to the store and got a book and luna bars then came back. It was a wed. which meant it was karaoke night. I waited around at my place for awhile then went to the liquor store where I got of course liquor. A lot of it. It had gotten dark by then so I went to the BK by the park and got ready put on my makeup. I think the reason I didn't get ready at my place was bc I didn't want anyone other than my friend knowing i'd been there. So I didn't want to leave any evidence. Then I went under a tree in the park drank but not too much as i'd be drinking at the bar and rehearsed. I went back to my place and left the shooters in the closet. Then went to the bar where I met another friend of mine. I sang at least 2 songs but 1 I had to wait an hr. for. The karaoke guy forgot. My friend left early and so then I got 2 crinks white russians. Went back to my place where I drank more.

The next day I read, binge drank and slept until about 3, 4 when I went and got chipotle.


	20. Chapter 44

Inspired by the pretty little liars fanfic 'secrets can kill' by pharoahwriter.

Puck

kate's friend spencer and I were sitting in hannah's room. She and the other others were at school.

"she needs to be hooked up to something," spencer said after awhile.

"uh. What?" I asked.

"hannah. Well if she's going through withdrawl as she has been she really should be in a hospital."

I didn't know hannah that well but I knew her better than spencer. And I didn't think she'd go for that.

"i don't think she'll go for that," I said.

"right which is why.i brought an iv," spencer said.

"um where is it?"

"actually I left it in her closet. I was in here the other day cause I couldn't sleep and she gave me sleeping . She has a whole arsenal in here."

"oh. I know. But thing is...i think jesse might suspect but we can't make it a thing. I know what to tell him but we need to clear it w/ um hannah first. Or else she won't trust us."

"right ok."

"when she comes back she'll probably want to shoot up again. Which means she'll be going through withdrawl. well. She might handle this better when she's high. So we can go out and smoke some and i'll talk to her about it," I said.

"ok."

"withdrawl causes dehydration. Before you came i'd thought about bringing her to a hospital but like I said...i didn't think she'd go for that."

"no yeah. But. Has she been driking? Er I mean beverages not you know. Drinking."

I smiled.

"well not or anything that's mandy's thing."

"the blonde?"

"yeah the blonde."

"um well hannah drinks soda...a lot. Sometimes she goes for bottled tea. she drinks sprite when she's going through withdrawls."

"ok well. I won't tell you want to do or anything but. I mean you know how dehydration works the cycle and all. You seem like a pretty intelligent guy."

"yeah I do."

i'd watched mandy go through the same thing. Many times.

"ok well going to text hannah about this," I said pulling out my phone.

"ok. Oh do you-yeah I think so," spencer asked as i'd opened my phone.

I looked at her: "what?"

"do you have naproxen?"

"yeah um she has it in aleve which. As you know is in the arsenal."

"ok. Cause she'll need it. Do you antihistamine?"

"um annabelle might mandyy's cousin. I'lltext evan who'll text her."

"ok. You know how this works?"

"yeah i've been through withdrawls w/ her."

"ok."

"yeah so i'll text then evan."

"ok."

I looked back at my phone.

'hey when you get back from school let's toke up. I need to talk to you about something. Well really it's about withdrawls. I'm not upset w/ you and you're not in trouble' I texted.


	21. Chapter 45

it was 2 in the morning when kate's friend spencer woke me up. We were in hannah's room along w/ leo, eric, gavin and I.

"hey um you. Puck," spencer said.

"hm?" I asked sleepily.

"wake up."

"uh ok."

I woke up.

"oh god it hurts," hannah said.

I looked over at her. She looked like she was in pain. She was in her bed not wearing a whole lot.

"what hurts?" I asked her.

" ...this. The pain."

"ok where is it?" I asked as spencer crushed aleve into vitaminwater.

Hannah looked at the vitaminwater: "ew I don't want that."

"but you have to drink something," spencer said.

"ok what do you want?" I asked.

"bottled tea."

I looked at leo who'd woken up.

"get her some bottled tea," I told him.

He stood.

"ok uh on it," he said.

"here," spencer said putting 2 pills in his hand.

"ok," he said going downstairs.

"it hurts!" hannahh cried reminding us she was there.

"i know honey...," gavin said in his sleep.

"where?" I asked.

"in my uh ."

"she's hot too," spencer said looking at me.

"um ok," I said coming up w/ a plan.

I went out of the room down the hall and to the bathroom where I heard water running. When I got there I kknocked on the door.

"yeah?" came mandy's voice.

"hey it's me," I said.

"oh. I'm not like getting sick or anything it's ok if you come in,"

"ok."

"and actually I have something for you."

"ok."

she opened the door and I came inside.

"here," mandy said handing me the 2 wet towels that were in the sink: "it's for hannah. I was up and couldn't help overhearing sorry."

"oh. It's ok. Thank you actually," I said taking them.

I went back to hannah's room and gave them to spencer.

"thank you but no you should do it. Or gavin. You know her better than I do," she said.

"ok."

"i don't want hot!" hannah said looking at what i'd brought.

"i know honey," gavin repeated.

"but these aren't hot they're cold. And it'll help. It'll take awhile but sleep when you can," I told her putting one on her head.

"ok," hannah said smiling as it kicked in: "i'm still in pain though."

"yes I have something to help w/ that. It'll taste funny," leo said giving her bottled tea.

"um ok."

"here drink. You don't have to drink it quickly but drink."

"ok."

and she did.

"yes we should all sleep when we can," spencer said.

She slept for a bit as did we.

"i...someone," hannah said waking up.

"what do you need?" I asked waking up.

"i.i'm going to be-" she said looking scared.

I quickly got a trash can which she got sick into. When she was done I put it by the door. We went back to sleep for a couple hrs.

a squeexe on my hand woke me.

"yeah?" I asked.

"i'm too hot. And this hurts," hannah said.

I looked up at her. I'd apparetly fallen asleep by her was pushing the covers off.

"i um..." I looked around the room spotting the bottled tea in the bed. Some of it had dripped but we could wash it later.

"here, drik. It might still taste funny. It'll help," I said hanging it to her.

"ok," she said and sipped.

The towel had fallen off her head and onto the floor. I picked it up. It wasn't all that wet but it was warm. I put it on her head hoping it might help.

"now i'm cold," hannah said in betwee sips.

I helped her pull the covers up and went in search of mandy. I found her in the hallway.

"hey do we have more...?" I asked about the towels.

"yeah they're in the fridge in the vegetables in the vegetable drawer so dad does't hoepfully find them. er I mean so my dad...so jesse doesn't...so he. Yeah."

"ok."

"what's wrong?" I heard from the bedroom.

It was gavin who'd asked.

"i'm too hot," hannah said: "and I can't get comfortable. And the bugs omygod the bugs."

"puck?" mandy said.

"what?"

"it sounds like you should go back in there."

"oh right ok."

right as I heard "puck!" from gavin.

"yeah?" I asked as I quickly came into the room.

"the bugs..." hannah repeated.

I remembered this. The bugs people thought were part of withdrawl.

"it's just part of withdrawl. It's ok i've gone through it..."

hannah looked up at me seeming to be caled by this.

"you?" she asked blinking.

"yeah. It's ok. I know it doesn't seem like it right now but it is."

"you're right," gavin told me.

"here drink this," I said giving hannah the tea.

"don't come any closer," hannah warned.

"she's really hot," speencer told me.

"we need to get her into the shower," leo said.

"ok um..."

"i'll go," the guy hannah was dating said: "i've seen her...well it's ok."

"ok," I said.

As he and hannah went into the shower I went downstairs to see how many towels we had in the fridge. As I was in the kitchen I wondered when the last time hannah had ate was. And I was startng to get a little hungry myself. I went to the fridge wondering what they had. I'd forgotten since the last time iwas down here. As I opeed it I felt someoe comein.

"hey is hannah ok is everything ok up there?" jesse asked.

It was jesse.

"yeah sorry. Did we wake you up?" I asked.

"yeah a little bit but i'm used to the chaos," jesse replied.

Oh ok.

"oh," I said.

Then after awhile: "ok."

I felt bad for him. I knew what it was like to not sleep cause you weren't sure when you'd have to be awake. I had that w/ my mom.

"puck?" he asked reminding me of the reason he'd come down here.

"oh uh. Yeah she's...she'll be ok. I don't know how much you know but if she feels like you should know more she'll tell you. But i'm not...going to do that."

"right I remember that about you. Ok well if you need anything..."

"right."

"and the other reason I came down for some coffee."

"yeah and I was getting a lttle hungry myself," I said spotting the raspberries.

I took them out of the fridge and put them on the counter. It was a lot quieter downstairs than it had been up.


	22. anna: sat nov 16th

anna

it was a wk. Later fri. nov. 14th. I was in my room reading when I heard the front door open. The house had been fairly quiet up until that point.

"mom," kate said.

So mom was the one who'd come in.

"uh. Yeah?"

"i...we...lily..."

"slow down hon. What is it?" dad asked.

"lily needs to go to the hospital. I think she has alcohol poisoning."

"she does," jake said: "we've been learning about it in school."

"damnit," karen said: "did you know about this?"

"her drinking? Yeah but no one's said much about it. And you certainly weren't around," jesse said.

They came up the stairs.

"who's w/ her?" dad asked.

"mandy."

"oh."

"and adam is w/ louisa and cherie. They should go too."

"omygod," mom said.

"i'll call 911," spencer said.

I came out of my room. Mom, dad, jake, kate and kate's friend spencer were in the hall.

"what's going on?" I asked though I already knew from hearing them talk about it.

"uh. Your sisters and cherie needs to go to the hospital. They have alcohol poisoning kate thinks. I'm going to call 911," spencer told me.

oh.

"oh. What should I do?"

"go tell the others," dad told me.

"ok."

spencer's friend toby, mom's friend pam and dad's friend jennifer were the only ones in the house. They weren't upstairs or in any of the bedrooms. When I went downstairs into the living room they weren't there either. I heard people talking in the kitchen and when I went in they were there. They looked up when I came in.

"hi anna what's going on?" jennifer asked.

"well um. Lily, louisa and cherie are going to the hospital. Spencer's calling 911. where are the others?" I asked.

"um ashley rachel and them are out somewhere. Evan and rebecca are at their place. And hannah's w/ her friends," pam informed me.

"ok."

"i better go check on spencer," toby said getting up out of his chair.

He left and went upstairs.

"i'll go check on your mom," pam said.

"and I your dad," jennifer said.

They left the room leaving me in there alone. I decided to make dinner for myself since I hadn't had any yet.

"anna," spencer said coming into the room.

"yeah?" I said looking at her from my place at the sink.

"your parents and pam are going to go in the ambulances w/ your sisters and cherie. Kate's going to text ashley who's going to tell her friends and annabelle. Mandy's going to tell jessica. Oh ashley's also going to text your brother," spencer told me.

"ok."


	23. Louisa: dec 2nd

Louisa

dad, lily, cherie and I were on our way to the hospital. We were in dad's car. Cherie, lily and I were in the back.

"cherie get as close to her as you can. Give her your coat. I know it's cold out but she needs it more right now," dad told cherie talking about lily.

"ok," cherie said taking off her coat and in the process trying not to hit either me or lily.

"we need to keep her awake."

"ok."

"what do I do?" I asked.

"just. Make sure she stays awake," dad said.

"ok."

"hey stay with me ok? Stay with us. Lily it's cherie and louisa. We need you here."

'i'm scared' I mouthed to cherie.

'I know kitten' she mouthed back.

"whatever you do don't let her drift in and out. I've seen my mom go through this," cherie told me.

"do we have any coffee?" I asked my dad.

"yeah here. It might be cold though," dad said giving it to cherie.

As cherie took it I came closer to my sister.

Body heat I thought remembering the times mandy had been really cold.

"stay with me ok?" I told my sister.

"no. I want to go to sleep. Let me sleep," lily said.

"she's talking that's a good sign. Long as she's talking. Here," cherie said handing me the cup which I gave to lily.

"no. i'm not going to. You can sleep later when this is over," I said.

"but i'm tired!" lily said.

"here drink this. It's coffee. It'll wake you up."

cherie and I helped lily drink it.

"whatever you do make sure she's on her side. If she's not well. That's how hendrix ended up," cherie said.

"ok," I said.

Oh god please stay with us. Please stay awake I thought.

I remembered a song that I liked and started singing it while holding my sister; 'won't you stay with me cause you're all I need'.


	24. Chapter 35

Kate

I was in my and anna's room when a knock came on the door.

"yeah?" I asked.

"hey it's me um..." spencer said from the other side of the door.

"oh come in."

she came in closing the door behind her.

"hi um. You're out of pills," she told me embarassed for some reason.

"really cause we usually have a full supply..." I said.

"yeah I um. I've had a lot of headaches recently."

"oh um ok. Yeah I get it senior yr. And moving and all that. I'd be drained too. um...ok i'll get at ashley and have her get at annabelle pills."

"ok. Who's annabelle?"

"ashley's cousin."

" . Oh and also don't know if you're aware but amanda-"

"mandy. It's never amanda. And don't ask."

"oh ok...well anyway she apparently sprained her ankle again so she's been needing pills too I guess she sprains it a lot?"

"yeah she does."

"ok. Um so what are we doing er having for dinner?"

"i'm not sure yet. Let me text ashley...my dad might know. About about dinner I mean."

"ok."

spencer left my room.


	25. mon dec 16th

Ashley

it was 2 wks. Later when annabelle came to our house. We talked on the front porch.

"hey listen I can't supply you w/ pills anymore. They're the main thing I spend my money on and the only way I can supply you w/ them is …...we have some sort of arrangement about that. I won't tell you know me. Sorry," she said.

"no it's ok. Listen i'll give you 40 for you to buy some like. Tonight or whenever and then i'll have spencer and kate sell them for well. We'll double that amount. I'll talk to them about that tonight but in the meantime here," I told her pulling 4 20s out of my purse and giving them to her.

"ok thank you. Let me know what you find out."

"i will."

she left and I texted kate who texted me back and told me she'd talk to spencer about it.


	26. Ashley: thurs dec 5th

Ashley

It was mon. nov. 30th. And toby, dianna, Rachel and I were all in the park drinking. Annabelle had gone back to her mom's on fri. it was where she now lived. It was 6 p.m. it was dark and cold. Dianna and Rachel were already on their 5th shooter. I was on my 3rd.

"I'm surprised you're not that drunk," toby said looking at Rachel.

"yeah well I've had lots of practice. Ever since. Um. 2 yr. ago," she told him.

"oh."

"practice that come from pain," dianna said.

Toby looked at her: "what kindof pain?"

"I um I've gone through a lot since I was 17."

"how old are you now?"

"20."

"oh."

"yeah it started when I was 17. No 16 actually. That's when I got pregnant and had. Her."

"who she gave to my mom," Rachel said.

"that sounds. Hard," toby said.

"yeah it was."

"the interesting thing was that my own mom didn't even want me and now she wants dianna's um. Daughter."

"wow," toby said: "I don't know anyone who's ever gone through that. I mean my girlfriend was stalked."

"yeah."

"more happened. And still is," dianna said.

she got quiet. I looked at her. she drank more. Toby got quiet too understanding why dianna was. she made a face like she was in pain. Then drank. As she swallowed I noticed tears dripping down her face. They were shiny.

"i'm sorry," she apoloised suddenly embarassed.

"why?" toby said.

"bc. I'm not allowed to do this. Be emotional."

"you can be emotional around me it's ok."

"and me too," I said.

Rachel stood.

"I'm going to walk around I'm cold," she told us.

"ok," I said.

Rachel left.

"so what happened?"

Toby looked at dianna waiting.

"um well. My dad has been. Hurting us again."

"you and Rachel?" toby guessed.

Dianna nodded not looking at either of us.

"wow," I said.

"while you've been here? Like for the holidays?" toby asked.

Again dianna nodded.

"wow. What a holiday season."

"yeah and lat yr. I found out he'd been hurting my sister."

"oh wow," I said.

I hadn't known this before.


	27. sat dec 7th

Mandy

it was wed. dec. 2nd. I was of course in the king's by annabelle's walking through the store when I ran into rachel.

"hey," I said when I saw her.

"hi," she said: "grocery shopping again?"

"yeah. And you?"

"can't sleep and it's quiet. Also I was hoping to run into you."

"oh?"

"yeah um I. I don't know if you drink or not...but I. If you do it might help."

it might...help...i wondered as we walked in the aisle. Then I got what she meant.

"oh you mean w/. after I eat," I said.

"yeah. W/. um that," rachel told me: "i got enough to get drunk off of. Shooters."

"rachel we're not supposed to drink in here. Er I mean be drunk."

"just tell them you don't feel good. I mean in a way it's true. Where are you staying lately?"

"annabelle's."

"ashley's...cousin."

"yeah."

"ok. Right so after you're done shopping we will."

"uh ok."


	28. Chapter 41

Annabelle evan went to her place

then she went back to where she'd been staying

then went to her place again

then went back to where she'd been staying until march then moved into steph's in may

annabelle

it was dec. 16th. I was back to where i'd been staying since last month.


	29. from denver to london

Mandy louisa kate anna

adam gavin leo eric

spencer

london

it was winter break. We were all at a cafe downtown. There weren't many other people in it other ta us. We were all enoiny our coffee chai hot chocolate when mr. schue walked in ordered and then came over to us.

"hey so I have an announcement," he said.

We all looked at him.

"so I talked to rachel's dads. And. Well we're all going to london."

"when?" I asked.

"soon."

"who's we?"

"the members of the glee club and myself. I got us tickets to shows. Well myself ad rachel's dads did."

"oh wow."

"omygod we have to pack," rachek saud.

"but not right now," I told her.

"will it be cold there what's the temp. like i've never been?" asked mandy who was always cold.

"my cousin has," I said.

"and I have too," rachel said.

"me too," dianna said: "it'll be 'll be in the 40's. But it's not sunny so. It is humid though but ot like hot humid."

"not like mexico,"s antanna said.

"so what shows are we seeing?" chris wanted to know.

"sweeney todd. And les mis. And probably phantom."

"wow."

"and those who want to can go to the museums. They're free actually. And to tea."

spencer was quiet.

"spencer I know you're new and not actually a member of the club but you're invited."

"that's funny cause my boyfriend actually just came from there. To visit."

"yes I know. He's invited as well."

"that's what they say over there 'as well' ", rachel said.

I smiled letting her take the stage.

"and it gets dark by 4 p.m. The subway is called the tybe oh did you?"

"yes I got us all tube ticket card...things."

"oh ok. How long are we staying?"

"a wk. but it's possible we can extend that."

"oh wow."

"yes. And. And there's more."

"ooh what more?"

"yor families are also invited. The glee people will be on 1 flight and your families on another. All your cell phones work internationally."

I knew rachel's family had money but I wasn't sure how much. Not that it was my business but I wondered how mr. schue was paying for all this.

A waitress behind the counter called out an order and mr. schue went to the counter. He talked to her for a bit.

"we'll be able to do laundry there but there's only 1 washing machine in the building. so. And othere people are staying there," I said.

"wait are we...surely you don't mean handel street?" puck asked looking at me.

"i think. He might."

"i'll be right back."

puck went to talk to mr. schue.

"my sister rose is from there so she'll be a big help," I said.

"and toby's been living there for awhile so. He can also help us," spencer said.

I looked at her: "right of course."

"we have to make a packing list," rachel said.

"i think. Ya know what i'll make my own ad if I have questions i'll...text you or something. Or rose. Or ashley. Or I can even ask spencer," mandy said.

"ok."

rachel went to where the napkins were and got 2 then came back to where we were and began writing. Then mandy did the same as spencer pulled out her phone and texted toby.

Kate and hannah went to where mr. schue and puck were. Puck came backtome and pulled me aside.

"ashley ok. So we are staying at 6 handle st. my grandmother's or er your grandmother maybe. Anyway one of them has cleared the place out so we ca stay there 3 in each flat. Our parents er and families will be staying in a hotel nearby. Although w/ your mom..."

"she might not come actually."

"oh ok even better."

"my sisters...?" I asked about kate hannah and anna.

"yeah that's what they're talking to mr. schue about," puck said looking toward a booth where mr. schue, kate, anna and hannah were sitting.

"sorry I couldn't help overhearing. The legal drinking age is 18 there," spencer said.

"oh so if hannah...needs...?" I said.

"right."

"but w/ vitamins."

"well I think it's only a problem if they're in liquid form. I'll ask toby,"

"oh ok."

mandy came over to me.

"scuse me." she told puck and spencer.

"yeah of course," puck said.

"yeah," spencer said.

"ashley are you bringing um. Lady...?" mandy asked.

"stuff yeah I will."

"ok."

'the vitamins shouldn't be an issue. Cause they're not in liquid form so.'

'right."

"spencer's going to ask toby."

"oh ok."

puck came over to me.

"so how. Are we dividing up who goes in what flat?" he asked.

"well i'm not sure. There are um... 19 of us including mr. schue. Well no wait. 21 add toby and spencer though I don't know. If they'll want to stay at the hotel not. so that's 7 flats w/ 3 people each. Oh wait I think miss pillsbury might come and your brother might want to stay w/ us."

"ok."

"i mean wherever people want to stay is fine." I said.

"right of course. So are we packing light?"

"i think we probably should."

"ok."

"what about...? " I asked looking at hannah.

"ok so toby says vitamins shouldn't be an issue. And as for um. Well...helping her," spencer told us looking at hannah: "yes they're permitted on the plane-" - she showed us a post it that had the word 'shooters' on it - "but that's once people go through security."

"ok but we're not allowed...no wait i'll ask my dad. I'll just tell him about the age thing," I said.

"ok."

"he'll probably be ok w/ it long as he knows. Actually your brother's 21," spencer pointed out.

"right um. I'll talk to hannah about it before I talk to him about it," I said.

"right ok."

mr. schue kate hannah and anna were finished talking. He went back to the counter to talk to the waitress.

"oh so we should get to the airport at least 2 hrs. before the flight," I said.

"right ok."

"do you have a passport?" spencer asked looking at puck.

"i've been to russia so yes," he answered.

"has it been updated?"

"i.i'll check."

"oh yeah that's another thing we should do," I said: "i better start making a list."

I went and got a napkin to write on.

Later that night

it was later that night. I was in my room w/ my suitcase clothes and packing list. As I looked in my packing list in my hand it occurred to me that england was right by france which was probably where marie had gone back to. Problem was I didn't know where exactly in france she was. So i'd have to visit the etire country of france in order to find her.

Earlier that day i'd typed up a packing list and printed it out. I was taking 4 pairs of pants, 8 t shirts, 8pairs of socks, 2 pairs of shoes. And extra clothes in case mandy wanted to borrow some. And lady supplies as well.

I heard a knock on my door.

"hey are you, going to do laundry any time soon?" she asked.

I turned toward the door and her: "um no but I might go to the store since i'm …...actually i'll ask rose to go. I know she likes going to the store."

"ok she might be asleep."

"ok and mom's?"

"oh she's out."

"ok."

I left my room and went down the hall into rose's room. That reminded me I was going to text evan about the alcohol thing.

Once I got to rose's room I knocked on the door.

"mmf yeah?" she asked.

"hey i'm packing but I need a few things from the store."

"ok hold on."

I waited in the hall. In her room mandy got her laundry together and brought it out into the hallway. After a bit rose came to the door w/ pen and post it in hand.

"hey um i've got some laundry going as well," she told mandy.

"i know but i- actually we have more than 1-"

"yes iknow and my laundry's in 2 of them. but the other 2 are free."

"oh ok."

"hey i'm packing extra clothes if you need them," I told mandy.

"ok."

she went downstairs.

"now what do yo need? Come in," rose asked.

We sat on her bed and made a list. After we were done she got her stuff together ad went to the store. She's be back in a couple hrs.

it was a wk. later and we were in london. It was night. We were now in our flats. We'd gone to the store gotten what we'd needed. We were sitting around drinking. Myself spencer and hannah all shared a room w/ dianna rachel and mandy right next door. Santanna brittany and amber were in the flat downstairs as were rose kate and anna. mr. schue evan and miss pillsbury and puck had 2 rooms between them. we;d put our stuff away and i'd gotten the liquor frommy brother and my dad. I'd given mandy extra lady products and some extra clothes. The flight had been long. We'd gone to dinner then to the store where we'd gotten what we'd needed. And were now sitting around drinking. My dad brother chris and toby were all arriving later and our families minus my mom and dianna's dad were arriving tom.. at some point puck and I were going to visit my grandmother who lived halfway between the airport and our flat. I wanted to make sure hannah, dianna and mandy were ok before we left.

"now how," spencer said looking at hannah who was sitting on the floor against the sofa, "are you doing?"

"i'm. Mainly i'm just tired I have trouble sleeping on planes. And i'm not of legal drinking age so. But here I am."

"right ok. So that means she'll sleep er you'll sleep."

"yeah probably."

I pulled out my phone and texted mandy: '….u doin over there? '

'ok. Rose is here and i'll get at her if I need anything. We all have keys to everyone's flats. If anything happens we'll get at you I know you want to see your grandmother. Or evan. or. Someone' she texted back.

'ok' I sent back.

I texted dianna the same thing.

'ok tired. and idinno sad for some reason. It's so different here and weird that my dad's not coming'

'I can take a look,' I sent back meaning at her bruises.

'ok i'll come over'.

"she's coming over we'll need the bathroom," I told spencer.

"ok anything else?"

"um maybe paper towels?"

she grabbed them off the kichen counter and hdned them to me. I put them in the bathroom. Which reminded me I should have mandy come over too. I pulled out my phone and texted this to mandy.

'ok. Well they only hurt when clothes are on them. I don't think dianna would have an issue if I slept. Um you know'

topless I thought.

'no. but rachel?' I texted back.

'she said she's ok if I need to'.

'ok'.

I went into the bathroom and turned on the light then returned to the living room where spencer was.

"you...?" I asked looking at her.

"yeah if we really need you you won't be far."

"ok and you know the plan for tonight?"

"yes."

"ok."

I went to the kitchen and got a muffin out of the bread box then turned w/ it on my plate.

"anyone want any?" I asked although they were perfectly capable of getting it themselves.

"no um i'm ok," spencer said.

"no I couldn't stomach it right now," hannah said from the floor.

"ok. But honey you should have something else in you when you're ready," I told her.

"ok."

"ok so for sleeping arrangements," spencer began as I unwrapped the muffin, "one of us should be in the bedroom w/ her. And I don't mind sleeping on the floor. And you were nice enough to have your grandmother clear the place..."

"no I. I'll stay right here for now tonight," hannah said sounding tired.

"ok. So then ashley can have the bed. Er if you want...it..."

"ok. It is big enough for 2 people from what my cousin told me," I said.

"ok."

"don't drink too much cause I don't want you hungover tom. Ok? Actually I don't want any of us hungover."

"ok."

"and i'll sleep when she does."

I turned back to my muffin.

I heard someone come in. spencer stiffened.

"it's ok it's only dianna. She has a key remember?"

"oh that's right."

dianna came in.

"hi," she said to spencer.

"hey," she said to hannah looking down at her on the floor.

dianna looked back up at me: "so where's the...oh here it is hall right. ok."

"be careful cause we don't have a bath mat," I told her.

"yeah neither do we," she said stepping onto the plastic adhesive mat thing that was folded on the bathroom floor.

"ow damn," she said w/ her back to me as she began to peel off her sweater.

I closed the door w/ myback against it.

"step back towards me," I told her already seeing lines of bruises forming on her back.

She did.

"when did you get these?" I asked her.

"a wk. ago. They hurt."

"ok I won't touch them i'll just look."

they were yellow which meant they were recovering.

"well they're yellow which means they're recovering," I told her.

"ok. And the pain? Well I know. A bit of whiskey."

"yeah if whiskey doesn't cure it then I don't know what will. That's what the irish say or maybe it's the eglish. So you. Well where do you want to be?"

"i'm tired . Even though you'll be visiting your grandmother your stuff is here. I want to come w/ you to pick up your brother though."

"ok so we'll get you when we get back."

"ok."

she got dressed and we left the bathroom and went into the living room.

"hey so she's going to stay here for now," I told spencer.

"ok," spencer said.

"and mandy is..."

"knock knock," I heard a voice say.

I turned ad saw mandy coming into the flat.

"hey," I said.

"hi I know right where it is," she said heading toward the bathroom: "hi dianna. And everyone."

"hey," dianna said.

Mandy and I went into the bathroom. We closed the door behind us and went through the same routine I had w/ dianna only mandy's bruises were purple. I got the paper towels as cold as I could. She went into the bedroom. I left them in the bathroom and went into the living room.

"hey she;s going to be in there for awhile. The...the bedroom so," I told spencer.

"right ok."

"everything's ok she needs to recover. From."

"ok."

I went and brought the paper towels to mandy where we put them on her back. I left closing the door behind her. I went back into the kitchen and resumed eating my muffin.

Later

it was an hr. or so later. Puck and I were in a cafe drinking tea and coffee w/ my grandmother. Who i'd seen only a month or so ago.

"thank you so much for doing this mrs. jenkins," puck told her.

"oh of course. Its the least I can do also it gives me another chance to see my granddaughter. And please call me lavander. Mrs. jenkins was my mother. How long have you known my granddaughter?"

"oh...3 yrs. Now."

"wow. Long time."

"well yes and no. how long have you lived in london?"

"well actually currently I don't. But I come into the city often. I've been to new york as well and the theatre here is either better or just as good as what they have here."

"oh. Yeah that's what annabelle's said from what ashley's told me. I've been there too."

"yes but I currently live in a big house w/ part of the garden being another garden. You see here we also cal what you would call 'yards' 'gardens' as well as the other kind the flower kind. Um but I did live in the city for a time in the '60's '63 and on actually as that was when I turned 20. I was born in '43."

"right I figured."

"so how was your flight? And are there any londoners in your group? And what do you think of the city?"

"long. And yes ashley's sister rose who you might've met...at thanksgiving."

"yes I did meet her. Other than ashley and jesse and evan I didn't get much of a chance to talk to anyone else since ashley was so busy showing me around denver."

"and also. Ashley's sister's kate's new er well friend from school spencer. Her boyfried toby lived her for some time and then flew in to denver to surprise spen spencer. He was there for about a month and now we're all here."

"oh was he...is he tall blue eyes dark hair?"

"yes."

"yeah I think i've seen him aroud."

"i actually haven't seen much of the city since we only just got in today but so far from what i've seen I like it. It's cold though."

"yes yes it is."

"mmm this is good tea," I said after taking a sip.

"how is kate?" my grandmother asked me.

"she's. She's good actually she's in remission now in school. She's been in remission going on well this is her 5th yr. Now. She wants to be a nurse."

"wow such good news. She was sweet."

"yeah it is. And yeah she still is."

"so are your brother and dad showing up then at some point?"

"yes later tonight."'

"and what shows are you seeing?"

"sweeney todd phantom and les mis," puck answered.

"oh all good shows. Is evan still w/...rebecca?"

"yeah they've been together as long as puck and I have known each other. They have 2 daughters," I answered.

"right I met them at thanksgiving. And how's sara?"

"she's ok getting along ok. She's still at my house. Oh she and my mom aren't coming."

"oh ok."

"and rebecca's staying w/ the babies though maybe one day she'll come here."

"i remember her she was lovely."

"still is. And lily you've met my friend lily."

"yes."

"she's staying to help rebecca."

"ok. I remember how good she was w/..." my grandmother looked between myself and puck and then back again askingif puck knew about my daughter.

"yeah," I said nodding and answering.

"ok. Yeah I remember how good she was w/..." my grandmother said trailing off.

She meant my daughter.

"do you like agatha christie?"

"i've never read anything by her though my cousin has a short bit."

"oh. Well if you have time go see the mousetrap. If you like mysteries it's a good one. It's been running at least 60 yrs. Now."

"wow. That is a long time," puck said.

"yeah."

"ok i'll mention that to mr. schue. He's my teacher. Er our teacher," I said.

"right I remember. so what else are you doing while you're here?"

I wondered if rose's roommate kate was coming.

"some of us are going to the museum some are having tea," puck answered.

"oh. Well that sounds nice. So when are you seeing your first show?"

"tom. Sweeney todd."

it was an hr. or so later and we were walking from the tube station at russell sq. to the flat. It was cold and dark.

"your grandmother is so nice," puck said.

"i've always liked her. Yeah and it's interesting cause she's my dad's mom and you know about my dad." I mean my biological dad.

"right. Did she spend any time in the south?"

which was where I was from.

"um yeah a bit. Not much though. Over time she tried to talk to him about it but nothing came of it."

"oh. Should we stop and get groceries or something?"

"no we have enough."

"oh. ok."

on the way to the flat we passed by a few homeless peope. In the dark I couldn't make out a figure under the thin blanket but she somewhat resembled mandy's friend lia who i'd met last yr. If it was in fact her I wondered when she'd gotten to london.

"lia?" I half whispered wondering if it was her.

The figure turned her dark head awy from me. Her sign read 'homeless cold and hungry anything helps. Need eough to get back to the states or at least a place to stay'.

I needed to get to an atm and to a coffee shop. The nearest one was by leicester sq. which meant i'd have to go back and get coffee but by the time I got it ti wouold be too cold.

"here I have an idea," puck told me: "you go to an atm. I'll get a cup from the flat that i've brought w/ me. And get her something warm. We'll meet at wairsoe. It'' take me awhile to get back from leicester sq."

"ok," I said knowing right where an atm was.

My cousin had told me some time ago.

As I went on my way I got a text from evan that said they'd just arrived at the airport. I called him and told him i'd be there in an hr. or so then texted dianna and mandy and told them evan and my dad were at the airport.

I went to the atm by waitrose got out some money went and scribbled a note on the post it. Well 2 actually 1 that read 'here' that i'd affix to a muffin I was going to buy and another that read 'the subways are warm for once you get moving'. I went to the store got a muffin affixed the post it to the muffin and brought the muffin and both the post its back to the figure. After that I went back inside the store nd wited for puck. It took him about an hr. to get back to me.

We went to the flat got our stuff ready and went to the airport via the tube to get my brother and my dad.


	30. ashley: thurs june 12, 2014

Ashley

it was june 12, 2014. we'd all come back for the summer we'd come in on june 2nd. It was a thurs. Id just come into my house to find dianna lying in my bed holding a shot of what looked like vodka.

"um. How'd you get in?" I asked.

"your brother let me in," she replied.

"oh. Where's everyone else?"

"I don't know."

"do they know yore here?"

"yeah um amber does."

"oh. How long you been here?"

"awhile. I got sick on your blanket," she said smiling.

Wow she was drunk.

"oh I also brought my own. Um. Vodka."

Ok while I realise she was drunk I also commended her honesty.

She put the shot glass down on my bedside table stuck her finger in it and began running it up and down her skin. She was acting v. strange.

"um. What are you doing?" I asked.

"cleaning. And I'm also hot."

She didn't have any visible cuts on her that I could tell.

"honey you're drunk," I told her.

She was still smiling.

"yes thank you mrs. Wilson."

And yet. She was still able to hold a conversation.

She was referring to lois Wilson the co-founder of AA.

"and you're 2 months away from giving birth. I hope for your sake you get an abortion. And for the baby's."

"don't tell me what to do," she said sitting and taking a shot.

"actually. I think it's too late. You can't have one at 7 months."

She took another shot.

"you have coat hangers right?" she asked.

"you're not going to use any of ours. And I hope to god you have a miscarriage. As much as I hate to say it and I do. But you have got to get into the bathroom in case you get sick again."

She got out of my bed and carefully made her way out of the room down the hall and into the bathroom. I heard her close and lock the door then turn on the faucet.


	31. dianna: july 8, 2014: meeting evan

Dianna

It wa a night in july. After staying a wk. At rachel's then chris' then ashley's last month I didn't have anywhere else to go. I'd been sleeping under a tree in the park the past couple days. Cory and I still weren't talking and my parents wouldn't let me back in their house. In may college had let out for the summer. Although cory and chris and rachel had all called me I hadn't wanted to talk to them so I hadn't

It had gotten dark.

It wasn't all that cold. It was quiet. And I was drunk. I didn't want to feel and I didn't care. As evidenced by the fact that I was still drinking. No one had come looking for me or anything. Well I'd turned my phone off cause I didn't want to be found.

"hey," I heard a voice say.

I slowly turned towards it.

"are you ok? I mean I know I don't you from…anyone but I mean…."

It was a guy.

"um. How long you been out here?" I asked.

"awhile. I spiked out and left my friend's. she's probably at the bar. If you want to go to her place it's ok. She's really nice. I don't know if you have a place to stay or not or even if you do if you want to stay there. Um. Seems like you've been out here for awhile and you don't seem ok and you're drunk. I get it if you say no."

"um. Yeah."

Somewhere new sounded like a good idea.

We stood and started walking.

"I know where we're going it's not far. She left it unlocked. She trusts me that much more than anyone. Oh she has liquor there which she'd probably let you drink. My guitar's there please don't touch it."

"ok," I said.

"and we're the only 2 there. I don't know when she'll be back from the bar, so. She doesn't have any pets. it's pretty quiet there."

"ok. Honestly I just want to drink tonight."

"ok."

He said nothing more. We continued walking.

"hey I don't know if you have a phone but if you do is it cool if I use it to phone my friend? And my girlfriend?" I asked the guy.

"um. Yeah ok."

"ok."

He pulled his phone out and gave it to me.

"thanks," I said opening it and dialing ashleys cell.

"mmmhmm."

"yeah?" Ashley asked answering.

"yeah hi," I said.

"fuk dianna. Are you ok?"

"um. Well I'm. I'm safe. I just. I need time."

"We really haven't done much today we've been hungover as hell."

We hung up and I gave the phone back to the guy.

"Rachel's your girlfriend?" he asked as we walked.

"well, wa."

"oh. When did you break up?"

"high chool."

"oh."

I liked that he didn't say much. I didn't want that right now.

I stopped and took another drink. The guy stopped too. I'd gotten the liquor from my dad. He had so much and was at the bar so often he wouldn't miss any. I hadn't been sober all day.

As we walked to. Wherever it was we were going I thought about all that had happened ince I'd arrived in denver.

A reason I didn't want to go to Ashley's or mine was bc when I'd been pregnant her mom had been there and she'd been insensitive towards me judging me for being pregnant in HS. And I knew my dad'd be the same.

"you hungry?" the guy asked.

"um. No," I replied.

I really hadn't felt much like eating.

"oh."

"oh."

"hey um. Is your friend pregnant?"

"no."

"oh. Ok."

We passed trees and small apt buildings.

"we're here," the guy said as we walked up to an unlit place.

"unlit?" I asked.

"yeah she. doesn't like people. Well most people. But she'll like you. Like I said she's at the bar. Or the store. She's a fan of humanity just not people."

"oh. No I get it."

He opened the door and we went in. I felt a bit weird just walking right in. the light was surprising after walking around in the dark.

To our left were stairs.

"you have to actually go up the stairs to get there," he told me.

"no I. figured as much. I got that," I said.

"oh. A lot of people don't."

"oh."

We went up the stairs and into the living room. The place was warm and nice. Opposite the railing was a green sofa which the guy plopped down on.

"nice place," I said.

"thanks. I mean it's not mine but thanks."

I looked around unsure of where to sit.

"oh you can sit anywhere. She won't be back for awhile. Bathroom's down the hall. But don't go in her room."

"ok."

I sat down on the surprisingly comfortable living room floor.

"my god," I said surprised by how comfortable it was.

"yeah I know," he said.

To my left was a wall and behind me was the railing. To my right was the small kitchen. The living room was big.

Now that we were inside I could see the guy was tall, thin and had big eyes. He looked bony. His hair was light brown.

"make yourself comfortable," he told me.

And I did. I put the empty shooter back in my purse and took out another full one SoCo. I wanted something strong and something that would get me drunk fast.

"you're mandy right?" he asked.

"no dianna," I said.

"oh."

"how do you know mandy?"

"we met once yr ago."

"oh."

"nice to meet you I'm evan."

"yeah you too."

It was quiet which I liked. Things had been pretty crazy lately w/ the holidays and then my dad hurting me and it was nice to be somewhere where things weren't.

As I got used to the quiet and the 2 of us I took sip after sip. I'd already finished most of the green apple shooters i'd brought w/ me. All I had left was peppermint schnapps.

I felt the guy looking at me.

"damn you drink fast," he said.

"I know."

"for someone who looks like she needs rest."

I didn't mind that he kneww this.

"what you got to drink?" I asked.

"vodka mainly. And whiskey."

"oh. What whiskey?"

"fireball."

"oh."

"we don't live together or anything. I just needed a place to go for awhile. My place hass too many memories."

"oh. No I get that."

The guy looked at me

"damn you look warm," he told me.

"yeah I am. Actually," I said.

"do you want me to turn off the AC? Or something?"

"no that'll just freeze me that'll just make it worse."

"oh. Where's your phone at?"

"actually I brought it w/ me I just don't want anyone to be able to find me. I mean you found me but that seems to be going ok so far. I meant people I know."

"no I. got it."

"ok. And im sick actually."

"oh. Um. Want me to make you some tea?"

"no. actually you know how to make a white Russian? Cause that would be great right now."

"yeah. I also know how to make fire pepper."

"um fire. Pepper?" I asked.

"yeah its my own invention. Actually its my friends, her and I. er. Its our own invention. Its fireball and dr. pepper. Pretty good."

"oh. Sounds like it."

He stood and went to the fridge taking out the milk and put it on the counter.

"she actually doesn't like milk. Except in white Russians," the guy told me.

I smiled.

"oh fuk today's Saturday isn't it?" he asked.

"yeah why?"

"I just totally thought it was wed. wow."

I smiled again.

He took a cup down from the cabinet and poured the milk into it then went into what I presumed was the bathroom talking all the while. He came back w/ a bottle of Smirnoff.

"im going to make this w/ original since I don't know how you like it," he told me.

"ok. You have colua?"

"we don't actually. Or cofffee. Shes not a big coffee person."

"oh."

"I can go get some. Colua I mean."

"no."

he poured the vodka into the milk and then stirring it w/ a knife,

"and here. Is your white Russian," he said bringing it over to me.

"thank you," I said taking it w/ both hands.

"mmmhmm."

I sipped it. He went back to his place on the sofa.

"hey if you want. Before she comes I can have you leave untill shes in her room. But she might come out."

"um. I don't know."

"ok."

I sipped the white Russian some more.

"This isn't your 1st white Russian."

"no."

And I told him the story of how Rachel gave me my 1st back in high chool when I was sick.

"she sounds nice," he aid when I wa done.

"yeah. She is. But since I'm going through some personal stuff right now I don't want to be around her even though. You'd think the opposite."

"no it's alrite."

"oh. Ok."


	32. Chapter 28

Un. Nov. 8th

Dianna

"damnit Annabelle!" I heard upon waking.

I opened my eyes to a lit living room. I wasn't exactly sure what time it was but my guess was it was somewhere between 2:20 and 3 the next morning. Which would've been un..

"why do you always have to do this? Also we have a guest and the least you could do is let her sleep since I have a feeling she hasn't gotten much sleep either lately!" evan yelled.

"well I'm sorry that I got hungry! Would you rather I didn't eat all?" a female said.

"no. don't throw that back in my face. You know that's not what I meant."

"look I don't like having to be quiet all the time."

"the world doesn't revolve around you."

I heard some noises in the bedroom.

"where you goin?" evan asked.

"idinno. Out. And don't follow me. I need time."

"look this is your house I'm not going to just let you run off for however long."

"don't follow me damnit. You have some general idea of where I'll be. And don't __you__ hate it when people spend 5 mins. trying to convince you that __you__ don't need to go out?"

"that's not what I'm doing."

"well actually it kindof is."

"fine. Go."

I heard the female who I guessed was Annabelle go into the living room down the stairs and out the door.

"fuk," evan said loudly from the bedroom: "now she's woken me up and I can't go back to sleep."

I heard more noises from the bedroom and then I heard him go into the bathroom and close the door.

I got up discovering the living room was lit which was weird since at my place it was always dark. When I stood I saw a post it by where I'd been lying which I don't think had been there before.

'dianna,' it read: 'the colua's for you Annabelle - my friend - went and bought some earlier. You don't owe her anything'.

I looked around trying to find my white Russian. I went to the fridge opened it and there on a shelf was my white Russian minus the colua. I got the cup out closed the door and poured the colua into it. I couldn't find a knife and was wondering if it'd be ok if I opened the drawers to look for one.

I went down the hall to the closed bathroom door where I knocked it.

"yeah what?" evan said from behind the door.

He was annoyed.

"sorry hi it's me," I said.

"oh. Sorry."

"um. Where are the knives?"

"drawer under the microwave. You're welcome to anything in the kitchen just. Put stuff back when you're done and please try and be quiet since I haven't gotten much sleep."

"ok thank you.

"yep."

I walked back into the kitchen got a knife out and stirred the drink. It was quiet and so far away here. I knew Annabelle had gone apparently out but I wasn't sure where that was. I decided not to follow her. I stood in the kitchen drinking my white Russian. I felt the palpable tension. I wasn't good w/ tension or quiet. Other than be put out I don't think evan or annabelle would hurt me. Not in the way my dad had.

Which reminded me….. I wondered if they had ice since my bruises still hurt. I wanted to take a warm bath since but decided against it as I didn't want to disturb evan. I could always drink myself into numbness which was what I'd been doing but now I had more time to. I didn't mind this plan esp. since now I didn't have a baby to think about. And since they had liquor I wouldn't have to hide the fact that I'd been drinking.

I went to the sofa and sat down w/ my drink. The sofa was really comfortable and the floor had been too. I considered the option of sleeping on the sofa even though I'd just woken up. It occurred to me that I hadn't brought a change of clothes. And I didn't feel like going back to my place to get some.

In the bathroom I heard the water running and realied evam was taking a shower. I wanted some aspirin for the pain but again. Decided to wait. The white Russian was actually pretty good. I finished it and had another. And another. And one more then went to the kitchen and poured myself some dr. pepper. I didn't know where the fireball was. In the kitchen I got out a plate and put the ice cube tray on it upside down. Even though it would take longer for the ice to melt than putting it under warm water this was the quieter option. I drank my dr. since I knew caffeine helped headaches.

From the bathroom even though I knew he was trying to hide it I heard evan making weird noises. They sounded like moaning. I wondered if he was ok. The water was still on.

At that moment I felt the drink come back up. I couldn't get to the bathroom in time so I went to the sink leaned over and let it out. I felt so. Embarrassed.

I sat down on the living room floor. The bathroom door opened and evan came out smelling good.

"hey you alrite?" he asked me looking at me.

I looked up at him: "um. I got sick. In the sink."

"fuk. I was going to go outside to smoke but if you need me here then…. "

"no actually. You go ahead."

"ok. Not sure how long Annabelle or I'll be, so. Don't lock the door. And don't go into her room. Vodka and whiskey's in the bathroom."

"ok. Thank you for the colua."

"mmmhmm."

He took off.


	33. annabelle: july 10, 2014: 10:30

Nov. 20th

Annabelle

It was 10:30 and I was finally back at my place watching tv. My friend had gone back to his place to do some stuff. I was in the middle of making myself something to eat when my phone buzzed. I dropped the burrito on the plate and went and answered my phone.

"yeah?" I asked.

"hi um….is this Ashley?" a lady asked.

"no this is her cousin Annabelle."

"oh."

I was confused.

"well. Your friend passed out on the sidewalk but in her state of being unconscious she said ashleys name."

"oh."

"I don't know how far away you are so I could drive her back to your place or…"

"oh. Is she ok where are you?"

"well she's not bleeding or anything though she does have some bruises but I don't think it's from that. Just down oneida. Are you doing anything?"

"no not a whole lot."

I wasn't usually doing a whole lot.

"ok well do you want me to stay w/ her or….?"

"no I'll come get her. I'm not that far away. Thank you for telling me. Oh and now you have my #, so."

"you're welcome and ok."

I looked in the fridge and saw we had fruit. And soda which would help dianna. I scribbled a note for evan in case he came back while I was out and then left.


	34. Chapter 300

Dianna

It was at. Nov. 21. I was in the bathroom of Annabelle's place. I didn't remember how I got there or even getting there. The last thing I remember is seeing the sidewalk. So someone must've brought me here and I hope it was either Annabelle or evan. I didn't know what time it was.

I heard Annabelle and evan talking.

"do you think she's awake?" evan asked.

"idinno but I'll check," Annabelle replied.

"ok. Bring this."

"I will."

I heard someone walking down the hall and then they knocked on the door.

"dianna?" it was Annabelle.

"um yeah?" I answered.

"hey I have something for you."

"uh ok."

I moved back and opened the door. She came in closing it behind her. She was holding a cup.

"here drink this. you'll need it. It's soda," she told me.

"oh."

I took it from her and drank it. I drank a good amount. About a 6th of it.

"good. How are you?" she asked.

"um. Confused. I don't remember how I got here."

"oh um well yesterday you passed out. I think you were on your way to the store. you've been sleeping on and off ever since. evan and I brought you here after a lady called and told me. I don't want you going out untill you feel better physically. I'm sorry I know it sucks. But we're just worried is all."

"yeah but I should be resting anyway. But yeah it does. Wait. she called you from my phone?" I asked.

"yeah why? Ohhh…right… your dad. Um. Ok well I have another phone you can use."

"ok thank you."

"yeah sure. I want you to drink all the soda. And you don't have to drink it quickly but you do have to drink it. The…the cup of soda I mean although if you end up drinking an entire bottle today then that would be great but I get it if it doesn't happen."

"ok."

"we have berries if you want those. And burritos. And eggs he makes good eggs. um oh and bacon that's pretty good. Please eat something today w/e sounds good and if we don't have it I can go pick it up."

"ok," I said.

It was later that day. I'd had 2 cups of soda and had eaten berries, eggs, bacon and 2 burritos. I guess I really was hungry. My legs had stopped hurting but I still felt dizzy. I felt full and nauseous. I was lying down in the bathroom.

"hi how are you feeling?" Annabelle asked coming in.

It'd felt so good to eat so I was really emotional about it. I was still slightly crying..

"um not. Great," I said: "my legs stopped hurting though. God I'm full."

"yeah. Are you nauseous?"

I nodded.

"your body's not used to this much food."

"I'm dizzy."

"yeah I know I've been there. It sucks."

"but oh it feels so good to eat."

"yeah. I know."

"um there's something you don't know about my dad," I began.

"yeah?"

"he…..I didn't eat for 5 days bc of him. He wouldn't let me."

"omygod wow."

"yeah and that's my way of keeping him away from me. Is, not eating. Keeping him appeased."

"good word."

"yeah."

"who else knows?"

"no one yet."

"oh."

"I'm really thirsty," I said.

"well if you kill off the rest of the soda it's ok. We can always get more. And you're probably dehydrated. Does your skin feel like it's burning?"

I shook my head.

"ok good. Cause if that happens tell me."

"ok."

"soda dehydrates you as you probably know but at this point I'd rather have you drink that than nothing at all. And so, does alcohol and you've been drinking a lot lately."

"yeah I know. I want to make it stop."

"I'm not. Upset w/ you hon. I get it I've been there."

"you're not?" I asked my eyes wide.

"no why would I be? I don't have a reason to be. I'm upset w/ your dad for what he did to you and to anyone else if there was an 'anyone else' but not w/ you. I get why you think that way though but also you have a disease. You're sick. you've been through a lot," Annabelle was so nice to me.

"yeah I am. Very," I said.

I was so tired. And my body hurt. My heart felt like it was being squeezed. My bones hurt.

"do you ever just hurt?" I asked.

"I have. Not in awhile but I have," Annabelle answered.

Even though I'd just eaten fries sounded good.

"hey um so fries sound good right now," I said.

"ooh they do. And the place is still open too. I'll get him to pick some up. And ketch no actually we have ketchup here."

She told evan we wanted fries and he left.

I slowly got up and opened my insides into the toilet.

"oh honey," Annabelle said: "I'm so sorry you're in this much pain. I mean I get why but it makes me sad."

"I am," I said.

"you ate too much and too fast and this is the reaction."

I felt so alone at their place. Even though she was really sweet and evan seemed cool I felt like an outsider. It wasn't a good feeling.

Annabelle rubbed my back w/ one hand and held my hair back w/ the other. I wondered if I'd be ok to make it to the living room.

"hey do you smoke?" she asked.

"uh cigs or weed?" I asked.

"weed."

"oh. I have. Why?"

"I just. I mean it might help. Idinno if it'll help your appetite but it'll help you calm down."

"um. Do you want money or something?"

It was the least I could do given they'd taken me in.

"oh no I got it. I'll be right back."

"ok."

She left the room.


	35. evan: she said yes

Evan

rebecca and i'd been together a long time. I didn't want to date anyone else and i'd decided that since we'd already had 3 kids – reva, karessa and briarra - and were holding off on having another that I wanted to marry her. I was going to propose where we met. I'd told ashley to ask her cousin annabelle if it was ok if we borrowed her camera to self time us when I proposed.

That june day rebecca and I were at my place. Which had become hers since she didn't have anywhere else to go. We'd dropped our daughters off at my dad's.

"rebecca," I said going into the living room.

She looked at me: "yes?"

"i want to talk to you about something."

"here?"

"no."

"is everything ok?"

"yes it's better than ok."

"um well alrite."

in my car I had the engagement ring, her fave flowers and the camera. Ashley would meet us as the park and videotape the whole thing w/ dad's camera. Annabelle would be behind the trees and take photos.

I led rebecca out of our place down the hall stairs and out into my car. On her seat were the flowers.

"oh these are my fave! We should go put them in water," rebecca said as she took them off of the seat.

"no just wait," I told her.

"but..."

"you're going to be even more confused," I told her: "get in please."

I held the flowers while she did. Once she had buckled I gave her the flowers. I got in and buckled. Before i'd come out into the living room i'd texted ashley that we were on our way. She'd texted annabelle.

I started the car and we drove downtown to where we'd met.

"but. We've been here before," rebecca said when we got there.

"yes I know. Bring your flowers," I said as I parked.

I parked turned off the car and got out as did she. We walked to the spot where we'd met.

"oh I think I dropped something," I said getting down to the ground where I took the ring out of my pocket.

"oh where?" rebecca asked looking down..

"no i'll get it."

I looked up at her. I was nervous and really happy.

"rebecca. Ever since we met I thought you were beautiful. You've been nothing but sweet to my sisters and so helpful around the house. And I know how much we all appreciate it. Yes we've fought but everyone does. You're so lovely and I want you to be and you deserve to be in my world for the rest of time and I in yours. Will you marry me?"

"i...i yes I will."

as I slipped the ring onto her finger we both had the biggest smiles. I stood dipped her and kissed her right then and there as she held the flowers behind my back.

"wow that's quite a kiss. We've not had many like that," she said once we came up for air.

"no we haven't."

"so now what?" she asked sensing there was more.

"come w/ me."

we walked to where there was 'she said yes' spelled out. The letters were made up of unicorn images my sisters had either drawn or gotten from the internet. The words were on canvases which were on easels.

"oh evan...bc when we met..."

"that's one of the first things we talked about."

"that's just. That's so thoughtful of them."

"well I was the one who came up w/ the idea. But thank you."

I nodded. Rebecca probably had no idea who I was nodding at. Ashley and annabelle came out from behind the trees.

"chapmagne?" annabelle asked offering us both glasses and taking the flowers and the ring box.

"we um. We're not..." I said meaning we weren't supposed to drink in public.

"the trees."

we followed them to the trees. Ashley went back and got the easels. She went and put them in my car then came back to us.

"i'm so happy for you 2," ashley told us as she took a sip.

"me too," annabelle said.

"good. There's something I want to tell you. Ashley since I don't talk to my family I want you to be my maid of honor. You're strong as hell but you're sweet and good w/ your sisters. Er well I guess they'll be my sisters now. In laws. But i'll think of them as my sisters," rebecca said.

"oh wow thank you."

"and annabelle. I've not heard you sing much but the times I have you've always been emotional. You're such a beautiful person. I want you to sing at our wedding."

"i...wow. Things like this don't happen to me."

"but they do. And they are," rebecca turned to me: "evan I want your dad..."

I smiled knowing what she was asking: "yes it's ok if you dance w/ him."

"so when's the wedding?" ashley asked.

"we don't know yet we only just got engaged."

"i wish marie was here it would make her happy."

'me too," I said as I had more of the champagne.

"the bridesmaids are going to be your sisters and the groomsmen...well that's for you to decide," rebecca told me.

"honey it's our wedding not just mine. It's ok if you have more of a say."

"ok. Well I like puck he seems cool. And I want chris there too. And ashley's er serena's um. Ben. I want him to be a groomsmen."

"ok."

"oh and your spanish teacher. And mark hannah's dad. That technically now makes him my uncle doesn't it?"

"yeah."

"wow."

rebecca took a sip.

"yeah i've heard that when you marry someone you don't just marry them you marry their family too," annabelle said drinking some more.

"actually mark's lily's dad lacey's her mom. They're dad's friends from college. But either way they'll be honored you asked. To be honest I don't know how chris would feel about being a groomsmen though since he's gay. It's ok if you ask him," I said.

"he seems like a sweet guy," rebecca said.

"yeah he is."

"i want cherie there too."

"ok...so that's...um...5 guys including my dad. Er well 6 plus mark. And 7 ladies. So the guys are outnumbered by 1."

"i...i don't have a dress. And it would mean more to me if I got it from someone in your family. Er our family. But I don't know...as neither of your parents have ever been married. Oh but mark and lacey might have one. I'll ask them."

"they'll be at my parents' today."

"your mom I...i don't know. I'm not big on her to be honest. I've been more of a mom to your sisters than karen has. As has pam. Who I also want there,"

"yeah none of us are," ashley said.

"after we get married. I want to have our own house. But we don't have the money nor do we have jobs yet so..." rebecca began.

"oh pam'll give us her place. There's enough room for our daughters and it's right across from my mom's, so," I said.

"ok."

"reva will start preschool in 2 yrs. So she'll be there during the day and if it's ok w/ you sara or my dad will take care of karessa and briara while you and I are working. Do you know what you want to do?"

"excuse us," annabelle said.

She and ashley left us alone to talk.

"no. I could move to amsterdam cause sex work is legal there. But then I wouldn't be here for you or your family. Unless we all moved. It's something I know how to do. How do you feel about me doing that?"

"what moving or continuing sex work?"

"well both."

"i don't want to move cause I want us to be involved w/ my sisters. If kate and anna didn't have cancer it would be different. I've always wished it was."

"yeah me too. Not for me necessarily but the others."

"you know I didn't like it when you were a sex worker. Esp. bc it's not legal here. But it's more that if you get pregnant I want it to be by me. My family will pay for your birth control if that's what it takes. I'd rather you run it out of pam's house so I know where you are. And if that's what it takes then that's what ittakes. Until you save enough for college or w/e."

"ok. But thing is...if i'm busy working I won't be able to just drop everything to go and help your sisters. Alexa's not able to do that as much as she wants to. In fact none of us are except well. You and I."

'well what do you want? Do you want to work or do you want to help? A lot of people do both."

"i don't know. Well I do but it's not. It's not simple. And thing is that's the only thing I know how to do. Is sex work. Well and. And the …...the drug trade. I'm not like. I'm not proud of it. And i've never told you this before. But yeah when I wasn't working as a sex worker I. I was in the drug trade."

"sweetie I will never judge you. On a big scale like that."

"back where i'm from that's what I did. I sold drugs I did drugs I was a sex worker."

"well I figured you shot up. How do you feel about being a waitress? Er a hostess rather."

"i could do that."

"i know where ashley used to work as one needs a new hostess."

"yeah. I'll explain my situation and. Yeah. But until then...untill reva goes to preschool. I don't like taking money from your parents."

"they are willingly giving it to you."

"yeah but back. Before I met you I was my own boss. I'd buy the drugs from people w/ the money I made from my other job and sell them. And sometimes buy them for me. And I liked that. I mean I liked being on my own like that."

"a lot of ladies are stay at home moms and there's nothing wrong w/ that."

"yes and while there isn't I want to do more. I've spent so much time doing one thing only. And you still don't have a job."

"well actually i'm looking into getting one at a store."

"oh."

"at a king's actually stocking."

"oh ok."

"yeah i'm still waiting to hear back."

"ok. Good so you'll be able to provide a little bit for us for the next 2 yrs. Although a lot can happen in 2 yrs."

"ok so we've gotten that figured out."

ashley and annabelle came back and we finished drinking.

After we were done drinking I gave our glasses to ashley who put them in our car. I know she'd texted my dad who would come get us. Puck would get annabelle and ashley and we'd all go to my dad's.


	36. Rose: June: 3:40 am

June: rose: 3:40 a.m.

Rose

I was in my room not yet asleep when I felt someone come into my room. I smelled alcohol and karen's perfume.

"i need to punish you," she said when she approached my bed.

"um. What?" I asked in disbelief.

"i need to punish you. So you dont end up like ashley or hannah. So you don't start doing. Drugs."

"but i'm not. I. I haven't. I don't even smoke weed."

"no you drink like lily and that other one that's right."

"louisa."

I didn't understand why karen felt she needed to punish me when i'd done nothing to be punished for. Well nothing she'd mentioned anyway.

"if you ever think about shooting up. You'll remember the pain my nails have caused. And I always have sharp nails," karen said digging them into my arms: "this is a lesson. Remember this. I'm trying to keep you safe."

"by hurting me."

"yes. Now you're catching on."


	37. Dianna: 3:50 am

June: dianna: 3:50 a.m.

I was on the living room floor of karen's trying to sleep. But it was hard cause I was worried about the baby i'd had back in march. This was the 5th one i'd had since I was 15. the one i'd had last yr had died when it was born. And then the one before that when I was 19. i'd had a miscarriage. That was the yr I met annabelle and her friend evan and we were still friends. When I was 18 i'd had an abortion. I was 21 now.

I heard someone come into the living room. I shifted in order to get more comfortable and whoever was in here had noticed.

"dianna?" it was karen.

I didn't say anything stayed still. Which evidently was the wrong thing to do. She came over to me and grabbed me.

"you whore," she said.

She'd never been all that nice to me so this was somewhat expected but still surprising.

I stiffened.

"ya know. You're making it harder for me to hurt you," she told me: "but not impossible."

she dug her nails into me.

"you got pregnant when you werent married and you didnt. Take care of it. Whore."

"yes I did twice. But it wasnt my choice," I said.

"those words mean nothing to me. You always have a choice."

after karen was done she left.


	38. dianna: july 18, 2014

July 10th

It was thurs. July 10th early morning. I'd told Rachel I knew of a place she could stay for awhile where she'd be away from my dad. We were at my friend's place.

"you always come over here this early?" she asked.

"yeah. He's alrite w/ it. His friend Annabelle is just lovely. He's a cool guy. Quiet," I told her.

"uh. Ok."

I knocked on the door.

"yeah come in," Annabelle said.

I tried the door and found that it was unlocked. They'd learned to expect me.

"hey I brought a friend," I said coming in and closing the door behind us.

"ok."

"wow it's warm in here," Rachel said.

"yeah I know. She, doesn't like it being cold," I said.

"I know but for july. Wow."

"yeah. I know."

We went up the stairs and into the living room. Rachel introduced herself.

"so uh. How do you know dianna?" she asked.

"oh we met in the park that's close by," my friend said.

"oh."

"and how do you know her?" my friend asked.

"from school."

"oh."

"so um we have whiskey if you want some. And help yourself to anything that's in the kitchen," Annabelle said.

"ok."

"so what's goin on?" Annabelle asked.

"I'm gonna go," I said.

"ok."

I left.


	39. Chapter 17

Ashley

it was the next morning thurs. dec. 11th. It was sometime between 2 and 3 in the morning. We'd all just come back from karaoke. The others were waiting outside while I talked to annabelle inside upstairs.

"hey um," I began.

"yeah?" she asked on her way to the bathroom.

"um I need somewhere to stay for awhile. Like a few days," I told her.

"ok here's fine. Your er I mean karen?"

I nodded.

"ok. Yeah. What do you want to drink?"

after a few mins. The others came upstairs.


	40. Rachel: June: at annabelle

Rachel

It wa un. Dec. 14th early morning. Dianna dad ha exually hurt me 2 day ago. It wa the firt time he had in that way. I'd topped by dianna that day.

I wa outide the door of her friend evan place. Well it want actally hi place it wa hi friend Annabelle ho a dianna friend ahley couin. I didn't know ahley that well and I hadn't pend much time w/ her. He eemed nice though. I'd only been here once before o I hoped I hd the right place. Id met evan and Annabelle back in july. They were both nice.

Even though I a pretty hocked about what had happened the 2nd I wa till polite and rang the doorbell.

"yeah?" evan aid from inide.

"hi you don't know me but I hope thi I the right place. Um im Rachel a friend of dianna I think weve met once before."

"oh."

"let her in," Annabelle told him.

"oh right."

I heard him come down the tair and open the door.

"hey," he aid.

"orry did I wake you?" I aked a we went uptair.

"a little but it ok. What happened to you?"

"um wow it that apparent? Youre evan right?"

"um yeah. Rachel?"

"yeah."

"yeah I think we've met once before. Thi mmer."

"yeah um. I want ome vodka."

"ok we have that."

When e got uptair I pored myelf ome pear vodka. I ipped it. Evan looked at me.

"you know dianna?" I aked once the vodka hit me.

"yeah."

"well her dad. Hurt me 2 day ago. Exually I mean."

"right."

"he doent know thi. Actually no one ele doe."

"oh wow."


	41. Rachel: June

Feb. 4th

Rachel

It a wed. feb. 4th early morning. I wa over at Annabelle again. I knocked on the door thinking maybe they were expecting me but I want ure. Thi wa the 3rd time I'd gone over there. On the 12th dianna dad had hurt me. Again. The morning wa dark and cold. I wa crying and haken.

I a about to knock again when the door opened and there tood Annabelle.

"hi good to ee you again. Um. What happened?" he aked letting me in.

"vodka," I aid going up the tair.

Tear made my viion blurry.

I went to the linen cloet where they kept the platic cup got one out and poured myelf ome green apple. I drank it. Annabelle looked at me expectantly waiting.

"um. Dianna dad. Hurt me again," I told her.

"oh wow. When?" Annabelle aked.

"the 12th."

"are you I mean are you ok? Er well obviously you're not ok but I mean. um."

"I'm not bleeding anymore if that what you mean. I haven't changed my clothe or anything ince apparently you're not uppoed to do that."

"mmmhmm."

"um."

"honey if thi **continue ** to happen maybe you hould go to the hopital. I'm not telling you what to do I jut. Um. Ell it not a bad plan."

"I know I jut I mean .."

"do you have anything?"

"I don't know I havent been checked," I told her.

"oh. Well do you have anywhere to tay?"

"well there my place but I don't want my dad knowing. Im going to college next yr. I might a well figure thing out on my own."

"yeah I know how that I."

"alo he might find me at my houe o."

"right. Well there always here. It'll be a bit crowded w/ 3 but it. It fairly afe."

"ok."

"are you in any pain?"

"yeah I am," I aid ipping more of the vodka.

"ok um. We have like. Advil. Or I dont know if you moke weed but we have that too. Although you really houldnt mix alcohol and pill but I preume you already know that and I wont. I wont top you. That not omething I do."

"ok."


	42. santanna: july: at annabelle

Antanna

It wa at. Nov. 14th early morning. I wa again outide of Annabelle place. 2 day ago Dianna dad had hurt me again. The morning wa dark and cold. It wa tarting to now.

"open up!" I aid knocking on the door.

The door opened and there tood Annabelle. He tood to the ide letting me in. I went up the tair and traight into the bathroom where I poured myelf ome fireball. I heard the door cloe downtair nd Annabelle coming up the tair. I wondered where evan wa.

I took a few ip of my drink then went out into the living room taking it w/ me. Annabelle looked at me when I arrived.


	43. july

Antanna

It wa thur. july 16th. It wa early morning. I wa in front of dianna friend ahley couin place. I'd met her couin and her couin friend evan once during the ummer. They eemed nice. 2 day ago dianna dad had exually hurt me.

The morning wa dark and cold. I knocked on the door.

"open up!" I aid.

I had no qualm about letting them know I needed their help. I usually didn't.

"open-" I began again.

But then the door opened and there tood Annabelle.

"hi antanna right?" he aked.

"um yeah. You're Annabelle. You got whikey?" I aked.

"yeah I think we met over the ummer. Good to ee you again. And yeah fireball and oco."

"where it at?"

"bathroom. Where there are alo cup."

"oh."

I went up the tair. Annabelle cloed the door behind u.

I went into the bathroom and poured myelf ome oco. I drank it. It went down mooth. I went into the living room where Annabelle wa. He wa itting on the ofa. He looked at me when I came in.

"dianna dad. Hurt me 2 day ago," I told her.

"oh wow," he aid.

"exually."

"no yeah I. I gathered."

"I haven't gone to the hopital for it or anything. Actually I haven't told anyone but you."

"I won't tell anyone."

"he hurt me lat yr. too jut not exually."

"oh wow."

"yeah."


	44. karen: 100th karaoke

Karen

It wa wed. dec. 3rd. I wa at my 10th karaoke night at the bar by Annabelle. He wa there drinking oco of coure and I wa having red wine. Pam had come he wa in a black dre her long brown hair wa down.

"thi I my girlfrriend pam. Thi I ahley couin Annabelle," I told Annabelle who miled.

"hi nice to meet you," Annabelle told pam.

"yeah you too," pam aid.

"are you inging tonight?"

"oh ye. Are you?"

"ye. I know mr. uh…I mean…."

"karen?" pam upplied.

Annabelle miled again: "ye. I know he I. you look nice."

"thank you o do you."

"what are you drinking?"

"a white ruian."

"oh thoe are good. Never been to ruia though."

"yeah me either. My mom ha," Annabelle aid.

"oh," pam aid.

"you know they make a drink called a black ruian."

"I didn't actually."

Karaoke tarted. Annabelle wa the 5th peron to ing I wa the 6th and pam wa the 7th. He ang 'fever' he wa ultry and enual. In the 2nd round he ang 'lady I a tramp' he had fun


	45. hannah: thanksgiving: finding out about

Hannah

it was the morning of thurs. oct. 10th. We were all at my house smoking. It was 3 a.m. It was quiet and dark. Giselle had joined us.

"hey you know charlie?" giselle asked lighting the pipe.

She then passed it to her sister.

"well I know of him," I said.

"yeah well he's our dad," breanna said lighting the pipe then handing it to belle.

"oh."

"we don't talk to him much. You know someone by the name of kristy?"

"that sounds vaguely familiar."

"ok do you know a stacey?"

"that's my aunt via karen."

"yeah she and charlie are married."

"oh. Oh wow. Wait so that means charlie our connection are..."

"yeah one and the same."

"i'm guessing that's why he doesn't come for thanksgiving."

"yeah maurren doesnt like that stacey's married to someone like that. He does drugs w/ his friends nick, adam and brian."

"vanessa's brothers?"

"yeah. Here," belle gave me the pipe.

As I lit I thought. Vanessa was the aunt of mandy's friend pansy whose mom was margo. So that meant in some weird way giselle and I were related.

The pipe was lit. I sucked in and ended up sputtering like mad.

"godamn," I said in between coughs.

"here," gavin said handing me a drink.

"thank you."

he nodded. Leo took the pipe from me.

I sipped some of the drink then coughed some more. My eyes were watering. I waited until I stopped coughing to drink some more.

"hey how come you guys don't cough?" I asked.

"cause we don't take as much," breanna told me.

"oh."


	46. Chapter 26

It was the next day early morning. I was at king's the one in Annabelle's neighborhood. I'd just finished purging and had gone outside. There was a tall thin guy standing smoking a cig.

No one else was out at this hr.

"Hey," he said.

"um. Hi," I said still feeling high from the purge.

"What are you doing out at this hr?"

"I um. Was walking around the store. For no particular reason."

"Oh. Annabelle does that too. You know there's something about you that reminds me of a blonde I know ashley."

"She's my sister actually."

"Oh."

"How do you know her?"

"I met her once briefly. I've always wondered what happened to her."

"Oh. She's in college down in fl. She's coming back for the holidays. Maybe. I don't actually know."

"Oh. You seem happy."

"I am. Well for right now."

"Yeah annabelle. She's the happiest person you'll ever meet when she's happy. And it's magnified when she's high. You smoke?"

"Yeah I know. I've been around her a few times. She's nice. And no. I do drink though," I answered.

"Well any time you need any hit us up. Annabelle won't mind," the guy said.

"Ok. so..." I said.

"Oh i'm evan."

"Oh. I'm mandy. I'm 17."

"i'm 27."

Suddenly this felt v. weird.

"I um I have to go," I aid.

"Oh. Ok."

There wasn't anywhere I actually 'had' to go at this hr. I jut didn't want to be talking to someone who was 27 when I was only 16.


End file.
